Mark Twain Quotes, Humor Quotes, Years Quotes

I wasn't worth a cent two years ago, and now I owe two million dollars.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Years Quotes

You can't pray a lie -- I found that out.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Praying Quotes

Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Men Quotes

Humor is tragedy plus time.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Tragedy Quotes

If I can capture truth in its simplest form, beauty will follow like a sledgehammer.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Form Quotes , Capture Quotes

I like Joan of Arc best of all my books; and it is the best; I know it perfectly well.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Arcs Quotes

It is not worth while to try to keep history from repeating itself, for man's character will always make the preventing of the repetitions impossible.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Character Quotes , Men Quotes

God rewards gamblers and fools. The crucial thing, when you win, is knowing which you were.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Winning Quotes , Knowing Quotes

The sole impulse which dictates and compels a man's every act: the imperious necessity of securing his own approval, in every emergency and at all costs.... It is our only spur, our whip, our goad, our impelling power; we have no other.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Emergencies Quotes

To do something, say something, see something, before anybody else -- these are things that confer a pleasure compared with which other pleasures are tame and commonplace, other ecstasies cheap and trivial.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Justice Quotes , Pleasure Quotes

A newspaper is not just for reporting the news as it is, but to make people mad enough to do something about it.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Mad Quotes

a fully belly is little worth where the mind is starved.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mind Quotes , Littles Quotes

I believe I have no prejudices whatsoever. All I need to know is that a man is a member of the human race. That's bad enough for me.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Men Quotes

An uneasy conscience is a hair in the mouth.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hair Quotes , Mouths Quotes

The true Southern watermelon is a boon apart, and not to be mentioned with commoner things. It is chief of this world'd luxuries, king by grace of God over all the fruits of the earth. When one has tasted it, he knows what the angels eat. It was not a Southern watermelon that Eve took: we know it because she repented.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kings Quotes , Angel Quotes

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Tea is an affront to lunch and an insult to dinner.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lunch Quotes , Tea Quotes

There are some few people I respect and admire, but I don't think much of the species.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Thinking Quotes , People Quotes

An Englishman is a person who does things because they have been done before. An American is a person who does things because they haven't been done before.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Doe Quotes

A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Education Quotes