Mark Twain Quotes, Happy Birthday Quotes, Time Quotes

Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happy Birthday Quotes , Time Quotes

We are always more anxious to be distinguished for a talent which we do not possess, than to be praised for the fifteen which we do possess.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Musical Quotes , Fifteen Quotes

Probably there is an imperceptible touch of something permanent that one feels instinctively to adhere to true humour, whereas wit may be the mere conversational shooting up of "smartness"--a bright feather, to be blown into space the second after it is launched...Wit seems to be counted a very poor relation to Humour....Humour is never artificial.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Space Quotes

I should have been glad to acquire some sort of idea of Hindu theology, ... but the difficulties were too great.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Should Have Quotes , Ideas Quotes

There is no salvation for us but to adopt Civilization and lift ourselves down to its level.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Civilization Quotes , Levels Quotes

A gifted person ought to learn English (barring spelling and pronouncing) in thirty hours, French in thirty days, and German in thirty years.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , German Language Quotes , Years Quotes

Laughter without a tinge of philosophy is but a sneeze of humor. Genuine humor is replete with wisdom.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Laughter Quotes , Philosophy Quotes

You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Motivational Quotes

When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Birthday Quotes , Growing Up Quotes

The dreamer's valuation of a thing lost - not another man's - is the only standard to measure it by, and his grief for it makes it large and great and fine, and is worthy of our reverence in all cases.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Grief Quotes , Sadness Quotes

A German joke is no laughing matter.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Laughing Quotes , Matter Quotes

Wrinkles should merely indicate where smiles have been.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Birthday Quotes

Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Half Quotes

I am able to say that while I am not ruggedly well, I am not ill enough to excite an undertaker.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Able Quotes , Enough Quotes

A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Clever Quotes , Law Quotes

It was on the 10th day of May - 1884 - that I confessed to age by mounting spectacles for the first time, and in the same hour I renewed my youth, to outward appearance, by mounting a bicycle for the first time. The spectacles stayed on.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Age Quotes , May Quotes

You can't depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Inspiring Quotes

All people have had ill luck, but Jairus's daughter and Lazarus had the worst.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Daughter Quotes , People Quotes

Never refuse to do a kindness unless the act would work great injury to yourself, and never refuse to take a drink - under any circumstances.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kindness Quotes

Good judgment comes from experience. And where does experience come from? Experience comes from bad judgment.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Doe Quotes , Judgment Quotes