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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- I pity the fellow who has to create a dialect or paraphrase the dictionary to get laughs. I can't spell, but I have never stooped to spell cat with a 'k' to get at your funny bone. I love a drink, but I never encouraged drunkenness by harping on its alleged funny side.
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- Sometimes you gwyne to git hurt, en sometimes you gwyne to git sick; but every time you's gwyne to git well agin.
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- The Koran does not permit Mohammedans to drink. Their natural instincts do not permit them to be moral. They say the Sultan has eight hundred wives. This almost amounts to bigamy.
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- There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
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- Independence-is loyalty to one's best self and principles, and this is often disloyalty to the general idols and fetishes.
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- Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
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- Tis Better to Sit there and LOOK the fool, than to open your mouth and prove it.
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- Great enterprises usually promise vastly more than they perform.
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- Tell the truth or trump-but get the trick.
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- Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.
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- The exercise of an extraordinary gift is the supremest pleasure in life.
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- The ancients stole all our ideas from us.
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- The problem with education is school.
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- It is agreed, in this country, that if a man can arrange his religion so that it perfectly satisfies his conscience, it is not incumbent on him to care whether the arrangement is satisfactory to anyone else or not.
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- There is nothing more frustrating than a good example.
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- Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths
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- Switzerland is simply a large, lumpy, solid rock with a thin skin of grass stretched over it.
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- I like a thin book because it will Steady a Table, a leather volume because it will Strop a Razor, and a heavy book because it can be Thrown at a Cat.
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- Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.
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- In my age, as in my youth, night brings me many a deep remorse. I realize that from the cradle up I have been like the rest of the race - never quite sane in the night.
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