Mark Twain Quotes, Animal Quotes, Needs Quotes

Human Beings are the only animals that blush, or need to.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Animal Quotes , Needs Quotes

Man is the Reasoning Animal. Such is the claim. I think it is open to dispute.

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Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.

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The most permanent lessons in morals are those which come, not of book teaching, but of experience.

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The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.

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I once sent a dozen of my friends a telegram saying 'flee at once - all is discovered.' They all left town immediately.

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History teaches us that whenever a weak and ignorant people possess a thing which a strong and enlightened people want, it must be yielded up peaceably.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Strong Quotes , People Quotes

It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Talking Quotes , Cows Quotes

Man is the only creature who has a nasty mind.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Saturday morning was come, and all the summer world was bright and fresh, and brimming with life. There was a song in every heart; and if the heart was young, the music issued at the lips. There was cheer in every face and a spring in every step. The locust-trees were in bloom, and the fragrance of the blossoms filled the air. Cardiff Hill, beyond the village and above, it was green with vegetation, and it lay just far enough away to seem a Delectable Land, dreamy, reposeful, and inviting.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Summer Quotes , Song Quotes

Vote: The only commodity that is peddleable without a license.

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Reputation is a hall-mark: it can remove doubt from pure silver, and it can also make the plated article pass for pure.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Doubt Quotes , Reputation Quotes

You cannot have all chiefs; you gotta have Indians too. Perfect love cannot be without equality. A friend to everybody and to nobody is the same thing. We are all alike, on the inside.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Equality Quotes , Perfect Quotes

Give an Irishman lager for a month and he's a dead man. An Irishman's stomach is lined with copper, and the beer corrodes it. But whiskey polishes the copper and is the saving of him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Drinking Quotes , Beer Quotes

To get the right word in the right place is a rare achievement.

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One of life's most over-valued pleasures is sexual intercourse; of one of life's least appreciated pleasures in defecation.

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Never miss an opportunity to shut up.

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Manifestly, dying is nothing to a really great and brave man.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Men Quotes

Apparently one of the most uncertain things in the world is the funeral of a religion.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funeral Quotes , Religion Quotes