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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father s. He's more particular. The father is always a Republican towards his son, and his mother's always a Democrat.
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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- The youth of America is their oldest tradition. It has been going on now for three hundred years.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes
- "Write that down," the King said to the jury, and the jury eagerly wrote down all three dates on their slates, and then added them up, and reduced the answer to shillings and pence.
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Tags : Lewis Carroll Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kings Quotes
- Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- It's better to hang out with people better than you. Pick out associates whose behavior is better than yours and you'll drift in that direction.
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Tags : Warren Buffett Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes
- The funniest people are the saddest once
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Tags : Confucius Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- It being a part of Mrs. Pipchin's system not to encourage a child's mind to develop and expand itself like a young flower, but to open it by force like an oyster.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Children Quotes
- I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- I have always been of the opinion that hard work is simply the refuge of people who have nothing whatever to do.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Business Quotes
- Most modern calendars mar the sweet simplicity of our lives by reminding us that each day that passes is the anniversary of some perfectly uninteresting event.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Anniversary Quotes
- A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Change Quotes
- It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- A community is infinitely more brutalised by the habitual employment of punishment than it is by the occasional occurence of crime.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- A book is made from a tree. It is an assemblage of flat, flexible parts (still called "leaves") imprinted with dark pigmented squiggles. One glance at it and you hear the voice of another person, perhaps someone dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, the author is speaking, clearly and silently, inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people, citizens of distant epochs, who never knew one another. Books break the shackles of time ― proof that humans can work magic.
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Tags : Carl Sagan Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- The movement of life has its rest in its own music.
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Tags : Rabindranath Tagore Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- whenever the literary german dives into a sentence, this is the last you are going to see of him till he emerges on the other side of his atlantic with his verb in his mouth.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes