A. P. Herbert Quotes, Funny Quotes, Life Quotes

The concept of two people living together for 25 years without a serious dispute suggests a lack of spirit only to be admired in sheep.

6 years ago

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Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

There were many reasons we broke up. There was a religious difference: I'm a Catholic, and she's the devil.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Religious Quotes

You don't have to deserve your mother's love. You have to deserve your father s. He's more particular. The father is always a Republican towards his son, and his mother's always a Democrat.

5 years ago

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal.

5 years ago

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Dead birds don't fall out of their nests.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Fall Quotes

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel, but not in the kitchen.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kitchen Quotes

A joke is a very serious thing.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sexy Quotes

For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction.

5 years ago

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

You gotta fight. You gotta get out the negative energy. Don't let it build up. You end up screaming at each other over something totally stupid, like, 'Well, why'd you put this spoon in this drawer then?' 'Just to p-s you off, that's why! I got spoons hidden all over this house! Keep it up, and your napkin rings are gonna start disappearing.'

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The United States invariably does the right thing, after having exhausted every other alternative.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

To say that obesity is caused by merely consuming too many calories is like saying that the only cause of the American Revolution was the Boston Tea Party.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adelle Davis Quotes , Funny Quotes , Party Quotes

It is a wise child that knows its own father, and an unusual one that unreservedly approves of him.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wise Quotes

The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what fiction means.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Change Quotes

We think our fathers fools, so wise we grow. Our wiser sons, no doubt will think us so.

5 years ago

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Tags : Alexander Pope Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wise Quotes

Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Forever Quotes

Golf is a good walk spoiled.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

The difference between stupidity and genius is that genius has its limits.

5 years ago

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes