Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Death Quotes

No real estate is permanently valuable but the grave.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Death Quotes

The proverb says, "Born lucky, always lucky," and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for one or two of our lads (per annum) to get drowned in the Mississippi or in Bear Creek, but I was pulled out in a 2/3 drowned condition 9 times before I learned to swim, and was considered to be a cat in disguise.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , New Year Quotes

No orator can top the one who can give good nicknames.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The good ended happily, and the bad unhappily. That is what fiction means.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Change Quotes

You can give without loving, but you can never love without giving.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Robert Louis Stevenson Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

One day in the shower, you figure it out. It's a special day in a man's life. I was like, 'Oh, I found me a hobby.'

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

This City is what it is because our citizens are what they are.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Plato Quotes , Funny Quotes , Cities Quotes

We are living in 1937, and our universities, I suggest, are not half-way out of the fifteenth century. We have made hardly any changes in our conception of university organization, education, graduation, for a century - for several centuries.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : H. G. Wells Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The movement of life has its rest in its own music.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Rabindranath Tagore Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Trust Quotes

I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read in the train.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Never confuse movement with action.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

This may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about.. when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

My rackets are run on strictly American lines and they're going to stay that way.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Al Capone Quotes , Funny Quotes , Running Quotes

Eating words has never given me indigestion.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Health Quotes

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community. Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than ever.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes