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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.
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Tags : Agnes Repplier Quotes , Funny Quotes , Women Quotes
- More and more of our imports are coming from overseas
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- Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them.
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- First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.
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Tags : F. Scott Fitzgerald Quotes , Funny Quotes , New Year Quotes
- Misery acquaints a man with strange bedfellows.
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- Think! I've got enough to do, and little enough to get for it, without thinking.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.
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- If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.
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- A man's got to take a lot of punishment to write a really funny book.
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- More and more of our imports are coming from overseas
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- For your popular rumour, unlike the rolling stone of the proverb, is one which gathers a deal of moss in its wanderings up and down.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Let me see you ride a donkey over my green again, and as sure as you have a head upon your shoulders, I'll knock your bonnet off, and tread upon it!
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Both Miss Lavinia and Miss Clarissa had a superstition, however, that he would have declared his passion, if he had not been cut short in his youth (at about sixty) by over-drinking his constitution, and over-doing an attempt to set it right again by swilling Bath water.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Coincidence is God's way of remaining anonymous.
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- Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.
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- Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Happiness Quotes
- This may sound a little West Texan to you, but I like it. When I'm talking about.. when I'm talking about myself, and when he's talking about myself, all of us are talking about me.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.
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- I have seen slower people than I am and more deliberate... and even quieter, and more listless, and lazier people than I am. But they were dead.
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- A fool's brain digests philosophy into folly, science into superstition, and art into pedantry. Hence University education.
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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Education Quotes