Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humor Quotes

A crime persevered in a thousand centuries ceases to be a crime, and becomes a virtue. This is the law of custom, and custom supersedes all other forms of law.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Clever and attractive women do not want to vote; they are willing to let men govern as long as they govern men.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest of my life, and hopefully after that as well.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alan Shearer Quotes , Funny Quotes , Soccer Quotes

The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

Frailty, thy name is woman!

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Memorable Quotes

I had to have a brace because I had big teeth. If I'd gone to Africa I would have got poached.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alan Carr Quotes , Funny Quotes , Teeth Quotes

Humor brings insight and tolerance. Irony brings a deeper and less friendly understanding.

6 years ago

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Tags : Agnes Repplier Quotes , Funny Quotes , Patience Quotes

... I had a latent impression that there was something decidedly fine in Mr. Wopsle's elocution - not for old associations' sake, I am afraid, but because it was very slow, very dreary, very up-hill and down-hill, and very unlike any way in which any man in any natural circumstances of life or death ever expressed himself about anything.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal.

5 years ago

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

A dog reflects the family life. Whoever saw a frisky dog in a gloomy family, or a sad dog in a happy one? Snarling people have snarling dogs, dangerous people have dangerous ones.

5 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Funny Quotes , Family Quotes

We are too civil to books. For a few golden sentences we will turn over and actually read a volume of four or five hundred pages.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Book Quotes

A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

In the fight between you and the world, back the world.

5 years ago

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Tags : Franz Kafka Quotes , Funny Quotes , Fighting Quotes

Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce.

5 years ago

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Happiness Quotes

The Cardinal is at his wit's end - it is true that he had not far to go.

5 years ago

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupidity Quotes

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

Is man one of God's blunders? Or is God one of man's blunders?

5 years ago

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Funny Quotes , Death Quotes

A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspirational Life Quotes

I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes