George W. Bush Quotes, Children Quotes, Humor Quotes

You'll hear people say it's racist to test. Folks, it's racist not to test. Because guess who gets shuffled through the system oftentimes? Children whose parents don't speak English as a first language, inner-city kids. It's so much easier to quit on somebody than to remediate.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Children Quotes , Humor Quotes

I read the newspaper.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Political Quotes

Since both its national products, snow and chocolate, melt, the cuckoo clock was invented solely in order to give tourists something solid to remember it by.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Alan Coren Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

But I also made it clear to him [Vladimir Putin] that it's important to think beyond the old days of when we had the concept that if we blew each other up, the world would be safe.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Most of you probably didn't know that I have a new book out. Some guy put together a collection of my wit and wisdom - or, as he calls it, my accidental wit and wisdom. But I'm kind of proud that my words are already in book form.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Book Quotes , Humor Quotes

A socialist is somebody who doesn't have anything, and is ready to divide it up equally among everybody.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Humor Quotes , Debt Quotes

I've changed my style somewhat, as you know. I'm less - I pontificate less, although it may be hard to tell it from this show. And I'm more interacting with people.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , People Quotes

I've got a great sense of where I want to lead and I'm comfortable with why I'm running. And, you know, the call on that speech was, beware. This is going to be a tough campaign.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Running Quotes , Humor Quotes

If I'm the president, we're going to have emergency-room care, we're going to have gag orders.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Order Quotes

I think there is some methodology in my travels.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Thinking Quotes

You don't ever ask a barber whether you need a haircut.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Warren Buffett Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Please don't kill me!

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Political Quotes

You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I assured the prime minister, my administration will work hard to lay the foundation of peace in the Middle - to work with our nations in the Middle East, give peace a chance. Secondly, I told him that our nation will not try to force peace, that we'll facilitate peace and that we will work with those responsible for a peace.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Hard Work Quotes , Humor Quotes

Unfairly but truthfully, our party has been tagged as being against things. Anti-immigrant, for example. And were not a party of anti-immigrants. Quite the opposite. Were a party that welcomes people.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Party Quotes , Humor Quotes

The only thing I know about Slovakia is what I learned first-hand from your foreign minister, who came to Texas.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Texas Quotes

I pity the fellow who has to create a dialect or paraphrase the dictionary to get laughs. I can't spell, but I have never stooped to spell cat with a 'k' to get at your funny bone. I love a drink, but I never encouraged drunkenness by harping on its alleged funny side.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Cat Quotes

So on behalf of a well-oiled unit of people who came together to serve something greater than themselves, congratulations.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Congratulations Quotes , Humor Quotes

Our nation must come together to unite.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Political Quotes

I want to make it clear to people that the idea of putting subliminable messages into ads is ridiculous.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Humor Quotes , Ideas Quotes