Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Wine Quotes, Men Quotes

Wine, madam, is God's next best gift to man.

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POTABLE, n. Suitable for drinking. Water is said to be potable; indeed, some declare it our natural beverage, although even they find it palatable only when suffering from the recurrent disorder known as thirst, for which it is a medicine. Upon nothing has so great and diligent ingenuity been brought to bear in all ages and in all countries, except the most uncivilized, as upon the invention of substitutes for water. To hold that this general aversion to that liquid has no basis in the preservative instinct of the race is to be unscientific-and without science we are as the snakes and toads.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , Drinking Quotes

SARCOPHAGUS, n. Among the Greeks a coffin which being made of a certain kind of carnivorous stone, had the peculiar property of devouring the body placed in it.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Kindness Quotes , Greek Quotes

ELEGY, n. A composition in verse, in which, without employing any of the methods of humor, the writer aims to produce in the reader's mind the dampest kind of dejection.

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Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.

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Consul - in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.

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RABBLE, n. In a republic, those who exercise a supreme authority tempered by fraudulent elections. The rabble is like the sacred Simurgh, of Arabian fable - omnipotent on condition that it do nothing.

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RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.

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You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute.

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The clarinet is a musical instrument the only thing worse than which is two.

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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.

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LANGUAGE, n. The music with which we charm the serpents guarding another's treasure.

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Self-denial is indulgence of a propensity to forego.

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SPOOKER, n. A writer whose imagination concerns itself with supernatural phenomena, especially in the doings of spooks.

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MUSTANG, n. An indocile horse of the western plains. In English society, the American wife of an English nobleman.

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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.

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gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.

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PYRRHONISM- An ancient philosophy, named for its inventor. It consisted of an absolute disbelief in everything but Pyrrhonism. Its modern professors have added that.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Philosophy Quotes , Ancient Quotes

Honorable, adj.: Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary to mention all members as honorable; as, "the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.".

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Gentleman Quotes , Affliction Quotes

PILLORY, n. A mechanical device for inflicting personal distinction - prototype of the modern newspaper conducted by persons of austere virtues and blameless lives.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Virtue Quotes