Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Art Quotes, Discovery Quotes

FINANCE, n. The art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager. The pronunciation of this word with the i long and the accent on the first syllable is one of America's most precious discoveries and possessions.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes , Discovery Quotes

At war with savages and idiots. To be a Frenchman abroad is to be miserable; to be an American abroad is to make others miserable.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , War Quotes , Savages Quotes

Ability is commonly found to consist mainly in a high degree of solemnity.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Degrees Quotes , Solemnity Quotes

EXILE, n. One who serves his country by residing abroad, yet is not an ambassador.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , Ambassadors Quotes

PHOTOGRAPH, n. A picture painted by the sun without instruction in art. It is a little better than the work of an Apache, but not quite so good as that of a Cheyenne.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Photography Quotes , Art Quotes

When prosperous the fool trembles for the evil that is to come; in adversity the philosopher smiles for the good that he has had.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Adversity Quotes , Evil Quotes

Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.

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An old wine-bibber having been smashed in a railway collision, some wine was poured on his lips to revive him.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wine Quotes , Lips Quotes

WASHINGTONIAN, n. A Potomac tribesman who exchanged the privilege of governing himself for the advantage of good government. In justice to him it should be said that he did not want to.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Change Quotes , Government Quotes

PUSH, n. One of the two things mainly conducive to success, especially in politics. The other is Pull.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Success Quotes , Congratulations Quotes

A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hands Quotes

Reverence for the Supreme Being, based upon His supposed resemblance to man. The pig is taught by sermons and epistles / To think the God of Swine has snout and bristles.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Thinking Quotes

RIBALDRY, n. Censorious language by another concerning oneself.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Language Quotes

ZANY, n. A popular character in old Italian plays, who imitated with ludicrous incompetence the _buffone_, or clown, and was therefore the ape of an ape; for the clown himself imitated the serious characters of the play. The zany was progenitor to the specialist in humor, as we to-day have the unhappiness to know him. In the zany we see an example of creation; in the humorist, of transmission. Another excellent specimen of the modern zany is the curate, who apes the rector, who apes the bishop, who apes the archbishop, who apes the devil.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Character Quotes , Italian Quotes

Curiosity, n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Passion Quotes , Soul Quotes

A less popular name for the Second Person of that delectable newspaper Trinity, the Roomer, the Bedder, and the Mealer.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Names Quotes , Popularity Quotes