Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Life Quotes, Song Quotes

OPERA, n. A play representing life in another world, whose inhabitants have no speech but song, no motions but gestures and no postures but attitudes.

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LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used ... as a counterpoise to an argument of such weight that it turns the scale of debate the wrong way. An interesting fact in the chemistry of international controversy is that at the point of contact of two patriotisms lead is precipitated in great quantities.

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You don't have to be stupid to be a Christian, ... but it probably helps.

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Brain, v. [as in "to brain"]: To rebuke bluntly, but not pointedly; to dispel a source of error in an opponent.

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Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

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Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship.

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Duty - that which sternly impels us in the direction of profit, along the line of desire.

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DAY, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. This period is divided into two parts, the day proper and the night, or day improper - the former devoted to sins of business, the latter consecrated to the other sort.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Business Quotes , Night Quotes

EXECUTIVE, n. An officer of the Government, whose duty it is to enforce the wishes of the legislative power until such time as the judicial department shall be pleased to pronounce them invalid and of no effect.

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PRESENTABLE, adj. Hideously appareled after the manner of the time and place.

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In the algebra of psychology, X stands for a woman's heart.

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MONAD, n. The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter (see Molecule). The monad has body without bulk, and mind without manifestation - containing all the powers and possibilities needful to his evolution into a German philosopher . .

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Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.

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Cynic, n: a blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be.

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RESPITE, n. A suspension of hostilities against a sentenced assassin, to enable the Executive to determine whether the murder may not have been done by the prosecuting attorney. Any break in the continuity of a disagreeable expectation.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Expectations Quotes , Done Quotes

Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Stars Quotes , Responsibility Quotes