Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Sarcastic Quotes, Patience Quotes

Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Patience Quotes

PRESIDE, v. To guide the action of a deliberative body to a desirable result. In Journalese, to perform upon a musical instrument; as, "He presided at the piccolo."

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Music Quotes , Body Quotes

The best kind of onion soup is the simplest kind.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Onions Quotes , Soup Quotes

All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Insanity Quotes , Philosopher Quotes

Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Peace Quotes , War Quotes

Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Divorce Quotes , Diplomatic Relations Quotes

art, n. This word has no definition.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes

Children who have proven themselves to be incorrigible by the age of twelve should be quickly and quietly beheaded, lest they grow to maturity, marry, and perpetuate the likeness of their being.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Children Quotes , Maturity Quotes

picture, n. A representation in two dimensions of something wearisome in three.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes , Two Quotes

Age is provident because the less future we have the more we fear it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes

TEDIUM, n. Ennui, the state or condition of one that is bored. Many fanciful derivations of the word have been affirmed, but so high an authority as Father Jape says that it comes from a very obvious source --the first words of the ancient Latin hymn _Te Deum Laudamus_. In this apparently natural derivation there is something that saddens.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Father Quotes , Latin Quotes

Nonsense, n. The objections that are urged against this excellent dictionary.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Nonsense Quotes , Excellent Quotes

An old wine-bibber having been smashed in a railway collision, some wine was poured on his lips to revive him.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wine Quotes , Lips Quotes

IMPENITENCE, n. A state of mind intermediate in point of time between sin and punishment.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Time Quotes , Punishment Quotes

Youth is Gilead, in which is balm for every wound.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Youth Quotes