Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Drinking Quotes, Medicine Quotes

Potable, n. Suitable for drinking. Water is said to be potable; indeed, some declare it our natural beverage, although even they find it palatable only when suffering from the recurrent disorder known as thirst, for which it is a medicine.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Drinking Quotes , Medicine Quotes

Children who have proven themselves to be incorrigible by the age of twelve should be quickly and quietly beheaded, lest they grow to maturity, marry, and perpetuate the likeness of their being.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Children Quotes , Maturity Quotes

DAY, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent. This period is divided into two parts, the day proper and the night, or day improper - the former devoted to sins of business, the latter consecrated to the other sort.

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PLAGIARIZE, v. To take the thought or style of another writer whom one has never, never read.

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gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Gratitude Quotes , Lying Quotes

A pessimist asked God for relief. Ah, you wish me to restore your hope and cheerfulness, said God. No, replied the petitioner, I wish you to create something that would justify them. The world is all created,said God, but you have overlooked something

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wish Quotes , Relief Quotes

An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes

The most offensive egotist is he that fears to say "I" and "me." "It will probably rain" - that is dogmatic. "I think it will rain" - that is natural and modest. Montaigne is the most delightful of essayists because so great is his humility that he does not think it important that we see not Montaigne. He so forgets himself that he employs no artifice to make us forget him.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Rain Quotes , Humility Quotes

Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.

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REPUBLIC, n. A nation in which, the thing governing and the thing governed being the same, there is only a permitted authority to enforce an optional obedience.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Republic Quotes , Obedience Quotes

EMOTION, n. A prostrating disease caused by a determination of the heart to the head. It is sometimes accompanied by a copious discharge of hydrated chloride of sodium from the eyes.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Determination Quotes , Heart Quotes

recollect, v. To recall with additions something not previously known.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Recalls Quotes

Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.

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Work: a dangerous disorder affecting high public functionaries who want to go fishing.

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Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.

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LOGANIMITY, n. The disposition to endure injury with meek forbearance while maturing a plan of revenge.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Revenge Quotes , Mature Quotes