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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear.
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- Scriptures - The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
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- Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
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- TRUCE, n. Friendship.
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- Youth is Gilead, in which is balm for every wound.
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- Impartial - unable to perceive any promise of personal advantage from espousing either side of a controversy.
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- A chop is a piece of leather skillfully attached to a bone and administered to the patients at restaurants.
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- IMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
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- Homo Creator's testimony to the sound construction and fine finish of Deus Creatus. A popular form of abjection, having an element of pride.
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- Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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- REFERENDUM, n. A law for submission of proposed legislation to a popular vote to learn the nonsensus of public opinion.
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- IMPALE, v.t. In popular usage, to pierce with any weapon which remains fixed in the wound . . . . properly, to put to death by thrusting an upright sharp stake into the body, the victim being left in a sitting position.
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- HURRICANE, n. An atmospheric demonstration once very common but now generally abandoned for the tornado and cyclone. The hurricane is still in popular use in the West Indies and is preferred by certain old- fashioned sea-captains.
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- CANNON, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.
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- REPRESENTATIVE, n. In national politics, a member of the Lower House in this world, and without discernible hope of promotion in the next.
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- A subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship . . . . [H]is master works for the means wherewith to purchase the idle wag of the Solomonic tail, seasoned with a look of tolerant recognition.
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