Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Mistake Quotes, Eels Quotes

POLITICIAN, n. An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared. When he wriggles, he mistakes the agitation of his tail for the trembling of the edifice.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Eels Quotes

Definition: CONNOISSEUR, n. A specialist who knows everything about something and nothing about anything else.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wine Quotes , Definitions Quotes

Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Photography Quotes

Inhumanity, n. One of the signal and characteristic qualities of humanity.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humanity Quotes , Quality Quotes

Loquacity, n. A disorder which renders the sufferer unable to curb his tongue when you wish to talk.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wish Quotes , Tongue Quotes

PROBOSCIS, n. The rudimentary organ of an elephant which serves him in place of the knife-and-fork that Evolution has as yet denied him. For purposes of humor it is popularly called a trunk.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Science Quotes , Knives Quotes

EXISTENCE, n. A transient, horrible, fantastic dream,/ Wherein is nothing yet all things do seem:/ From which we're wakened by a friendly nudge/ Of our bedfellow Death, and cry: "O fudge!"

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Dream Quotes , Nudge Nudge Quotes

INADMISSIBLE- Not competent to be considered. Hearsay evidence is inadmissible ... but there is no religion in the world that has any other basis than hearsay evidence.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Religion Quotes , World Quotes

UNITARIAN, n. One who denies the divinity of a Trinitarian.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Divinity Quotes , Deny Quotes

Behavior, n. Conduct, as determined, not by principle, but by breeding.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Principles Quotes , Determined Quotes

MAGIC, n. An art of converting superstition into coin. There are other arts serving the same high purpose, but the discreet lexicographer does not name them.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes , Names Quotes

MULTITUDE, n. A crowd; the source of political wisdom and virtue. In a republic, the object of the statesman's adoration.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Political Quotes

SACERDOTALIST, n. One who holds the belief that a clergyman is a priest. Denial of this momentous doctrine is the hardest challenge that is now flung into the teeth of the Episcopalian church by the Neo-Dictionarians.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Challenges Quotes , Church Quotes

The bold and discerning writer who, recognizing the truth that language must grow by innovation if it grow at all, makes new words and uses the old in an unfamiliar sense has no following and is tartly reminded that 'it isn't in the dictionary' - although down to the time of the first lexicographer no author ever had used a word that was in the dictionary.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Innovation Quotes , Lexicographer Quotes

gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Gratitude Quotes , Lying Quotes

Pantheism, n. The doctrine that everything is God, in contradistinction to the doctrine that God is everything.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Doctrine Quotes

FROG, n. A reptile with edible legs

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Science Quotes

Congratulations is the civility of envy.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Success Quotes , Congratulations Quotes

CUNNING, n. The faculty that distinguishes a weak animal or person from a strong one. It brings its possessor much mental satisfaction and great material adversity. An Italian proverb says: "The furrier gets the skins of more foxes than asses."

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Strong Quotes , Adversity Quotes

Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another's resemblance to ourselves.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Love Quotes , Appreciation Quotes