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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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- Scriptures - The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
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- YOUTH, n. The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a living Homer.
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- Cribbage, n. A substitute for conversation among those to whom nature has denied ideas.
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- PLAGUE, n. In ancient times a general punishment of the innocent for admonition of their ruler, as in the familiar instance of Pharaoh the Immune. The plague today . . . is merely Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.
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- Curiosity, n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul.
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- Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
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- DELUSION, n. The father of a most respectable family, comprising Enthusiasm, Affection, Self-denial, Faith, Hope, Charity and many other goodly sons and daughters.
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- MEDICINE, n. A stone flung down the Bowery to kill a dog in Broadway.
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- Contempt; the feeling of a prudent man for an enemy who is too formidable safely to be opposed.
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- Uncommon extension of the fear of death.
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- Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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- Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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- MAMMON, n. The god of the world's leading religion. The chief temple is in the holy city of New York.
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- APHORISM, n. Predigested wisdom.
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- Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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- The creator and arbiter of beauty is the heart; to the male rattlesnake the female rattlesnake is the loveliest thing in nature.
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- OPIATE, n. An unlocked door in the prison of Identity. It leads into the jail yard.
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- Amnesty, n. The state's magnanimity to those offenders whom it would be too expensive to punish.
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- We must stop chasing dollars, stop lying, stop cheating, stop ignoring art, literature, and all the refining agencies and instrumentalities of civilization.
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