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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Phoenix, n. The classical prototype of the modern 'small hot bird.'
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- Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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- A single swallow, it is said, devours ten millions of insects every year. The supplying of these insects I take to be a signal instance of the Creator's bounty in providing for the lives of His creatures.
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- TALK, v.t. To commit an indiscretion without temptation, from an impulse without purpose.
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- RICE-WATER, n. A mystic beverage secretly used by our most popular novelists and poets to regulate the imagination and narcotize the conscience.
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- A malefactor who atones for making your writing nonsense by permitting the compositor to make it unintelligible.
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- When prosperous the fool trembles for the evil that is to come; in adversity the philosopher smiles for the good that he has had.
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- A popular vote to ascertain the will of the sovereign.
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- RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.
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- ETHNOLOGY, n. The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.
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- CAVILER, n. A critic of our own work.
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- IMPALE, v.t. In popular usage, to pierce with any weapon which remains fixed in the wound . . . . properly, to put to death by thrusting an upright sharp stake into the body, the victim being left in a sitting position.
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- Alligator: The crocodile of America, superior in every detail to the crocodile of the effete monarchies of the Old World.
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- Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
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- ILLUSTRIOUS, adj. Suitably placed for the shafts of malice, envy and detraction.
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- A nutritious substance supplied by a bountiful Providence for the fattening of the poor.
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- OBLIVION, n. Cold storage for high hopes. A place where ambitious authors meet their works without pride and their betters without envy. A dormitory without an alarm clock.
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- Platitude: All that is mortal of a departed truth.
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- LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used in giving stability to light lovers - particularly to those who love not wisely but other men's wives.
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- Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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