Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Two Quotes, Shapes Quotes

K, n. A consonant; originally precisely that of our H, but altered to its present shape to commemorate the destruction of [one of two lofty columns in] the great temple of Jarute.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Two Quotes , Shapes Quotes

If you would be accounted great by your contemporaries, be not too much greater than they.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Would Be Quotes , Too Much Quotes

ACCOUNTABILITY, n. The mother of caution.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mother Quotes , Motherhood Quotes

POLITICIAN, n. An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared. When he wriggles, he mistakes the agitation of his tail for the trembling of the edifice.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Eels Quotes

Enthusiasm - a distemper of youth, curable by small doses of repentance in connection with outward applications of experience.

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A bad workman quarrels with the man who calls him that.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , He Man Quotes

LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose; without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg "pate".

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Nature Quotes , Bird Quotes

NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

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Truth is more deceptive than falsehood, for it is more frequently presented by those from whom we do not expect it, and so has against it a numerical presumption.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Truth Quotes , Deceptive Quotes

Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Motivational Quotes , Drinking Quotes

MULTITUDE, n. A crowd; the source of political wisdom and virtue. In a republic, the object of the statesman's adoration.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Political Quotes

Every patriot believes his country better than any other country . . . In its active manifestation-it is fond of killing-patriotism would be well enough if it were simply defensive, but it is also aggressive . . . Patriotism deliberately and with folly aforethought subordinates the interests of a whole to the interests of a part . . . Patriotism is fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave and blind as a stone.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , War Quotes

INCOMPATIBILITY, n. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination. Incompatibility may, however, consist of a meek-eyed matron living just around the corner. It has even been known to wear a moustache.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Justice Quotes

Prejudice - a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.

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Income is the natural and rational gauge and measure of respectability.

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Pertaining to a certain order of architecture, otherwise known as Normal American. Most of the public buildings of the United States are of the Ramshackle order, though some of our earlier architects preferred the Ironic. Recent additions to the White House in Washington are Theo-Doric, the ecclesiastic order of the Dorians. They are exceedingly fine and cost one hundred dollars a brick.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Order Quotes , White Quotes

Magic: (n) The art of converting superstition into coin.

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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.

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INCOMPOSSIBLE, adj. Unable to exist if something else exists. Two things are incompossible when the world of being has scope enough for one of them, but not enough for both - as Walt Whitman's poetry and God's mercy to man.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Two Quotes

picture, n. A representation in two dimensions of something wearisome in three.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes , Two Quotes