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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- REVIEW, v.t. To set your wisdom (holding not a doubt of it./ Although in truth there's neither bone nor skin to it)/ At work upon a book, and so read out of it/ The qualities that you have first read into it.
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- Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.
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- Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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- While you have a future do not live too much in contemplation of your past: unless you are content to walk backward the mirror is a poor guide.
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- LOGOMACHY, n. A war in which the weapons are words and the wounds punctures in the swim-bladder of self-esteem - a kind of contest in which, the vanquished being unconscious of defeat, the victor is denied the reward of success.
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- Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.
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- URBANITY, n. The kind of civility that urban observers ascribe to dwellers in all cities but New York. Its commonest expression is heard in the words, "I beg your pardon," and it is not consistent with disregard of the rights of others.
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- Abnormal, adj. Not conforming to standard. In matters of thought and conduct, to be independent is to be abnormal, to be abnormal is to be detested.
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- Backbite: To ''speak of a man as you find him'' when he can't find you.
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- The place whereon the priest formerly raveled out the small intestine of the sacrificial victim for purposes of divination and cooked its flesh for the gods. The word is now seldom used, except with reference to the sacrifice of their liberty and peace by a male and a female fool.
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- PANTOMIME, n. A play in which the story is told without violence to the language. The least disagreeable form of dramatic action.
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- HYDRA, n. A kind of animal that the ancients catalogued under many heads.
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- EXTINCTION, n. The raw material out of which theology created the future state.
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- To those who view the voyage of life from the port of departure the bark that has accomplished any considerable distance appears already in close approach to the farther shore.
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- ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.
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- ORPHAN, n. A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude . . .
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- DIAPHRAGM, n. A muscular partition separating disorders of the chest from disorders of the bowels.
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- Prescription: A physician's guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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- ETHNOLOGY, n. The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.
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- PRISON, n. A place of punishments and rewards. The poet assures us that - stone walls do not a prison make.
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