Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Struggle Quotes, Wicked Quotes

OBLIVION, n. The state or condition in which the wicked cease from struggling and the dreary are at rest. Fame's eternal dumping ground.

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PHYSICIAN, n. One upon whom we set our hopes when ill and our dogs when well.

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AFFLICTION, n. An acclimatizing process preparing the soul for another and bitter world.

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Curiosity, n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul.

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CARNIVOROUS, adj. Addicted to the cruelty of devouring the timorous vegetarian, his heirs and assigns.

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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

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APOTHECARY, n. The physician's accomplice, undertaker's benefactor and grave worm's provider

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INJUSTICE, n. A burden which of all those that we load upon others and carry ourselves is lightest in the hands and heaviest upon the back.

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Insurance - an ingenious modern game of chance in which the player is permitted to enjoy the comfortable conviction that he is beating the man who keeps the table.

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Happiness: an agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of another.

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To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.

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NOTORIETY, n. The fame of one's competitor for public honors. The kind of renown most accessible and acceptable to mediocrity. A Jacob's-ladder leading to the vaudeville stage, with angels ascending and descending.

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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet - two clarinets.

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applause, n. The echo of a platitude.

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The most offensive egotist is he that fears to say "I" and "me." "It will probably rain" - that is dogmatic. "I think it will rain" - that is natural and modest. Montaigne is the most delightful of essayists because so great is his humility that he does not think it important that we see not Montaigne. He so forgets himself that he employs no artifice to make us forget him.

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The sum of religion, says Pythagoras, is to be like him thou worshipest. Had Pythagoras lived in our day he would have seen his mistake. The sum of modern religion is to make him thou worshipest like unto thyself.

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DISCRIMINATE, v.i. To note the particulars in which one person or thing is, if possible, more objectionable than another.

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Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.

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LOVE, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder.

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The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerful republics are the most warlike and unscrupulous of nations.

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