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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- The slightest acquaintance with history shows that powerful republics are the most warlike and unscrupulous of nations.
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- COMMENDATION n. The tribute that we pay to achievements that resembles but do not equal our own.
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- PREFERENCE, n. A sentiment, or frame of mind, induced by the erroneous belief that one thing is better than another.
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- Nothing is more logical than persecution. Religious tolerance is a kind of infidelity.
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- The sum of religion, says Pythagoras, is to be like him thou worshipest. Had Pythagoras lived in our day he would have seen his mistake. The sum of modern religion is to make him thou worshipest like unto thyself.
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- Economy, n. Purchasing the barrel of whiskey that you do not need for the price of the cow that you cannot afford.
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- Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance.
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- Age, with his eyes in the back of his head, thinks it wisdom to see the bogs through which he has floundered.
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- SATIETY, n. The feeling that one has for the plate after he has eaten its contents, madam.
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- BRANDY, n. A cordial composed on one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.
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- A lottery is a tax on stupidity.
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- One engaged in a commercial pursuit. A commercial pursuit is one in which the thing pursued is a dollar.
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- Honorable, adj.: Afflicted with an impediment in one's reach. In legislative bodies, it is customary to mention all members as honorable; as, "the honorable gentleman is a scurvy cur.".
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- War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.
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- Cribbage, n. A substitute for conversation among those to whom nature has denied ideas.
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- MISCREANT, n. A person of the highest degree of unworth. Etymologically, the word means unbeliever, and its present signification may be regarded as theology's noblest contribution to the development of our language.
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- MONOSYLLABIC, adj. Composed of words of one syllable . . . Commonly Saxon - that is to say, words of a barbarous people destitute of ideas and incapable of any but the most elementary sentiments and emotions.
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- WHEAT, n. A cereal from which a tolerably good whisky can be made; . . . also for bread. The French are said to eat more bread "per capita" of population than any other people, which is natural, for only they know how to make the stuff palatable.
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- PITIFUL, adj. The state of an enemy or opponent after an imaginary encounter with oneself.
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- renown, n. A degree of distinction between notoriety and fame - a little more supportable than the one and a little more intolerable than the other. Sometimes it is conferred by an unfriendly and inconsiderate hand.
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