Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Disappointment Quotes, Stage Quotes

predilection, n. The preparatory stage of disillusion.

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HIBERNATE, v. i. To pass the winter season in domestic seclusion. There have been many singular popular notions about the hibernation of various animals. Many believe that the bear hibernates during the whole winter and subsists by mechanically sucking its paws. It is admitted that it comes out of its retirement in the spring so lean that it has to try twice before it can cast a shadow.

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A popular author is one who writes what the people think. Genius invites them to think something else.

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CERBERUS, n. The watch-dog of Hades, whose duty it was to guard the entrance - against whom or what does not clearly appear; everybody, sooner or later, had to go there, and nobody wanted to carry off the entrance.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Dog Quotes , Doe Quotes

PRESIDENT, n. The leading figure in a small group of men of whom - and of whom only - it is positively known that immense numbers of their countrymen did not want any of them for President.

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Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.

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Nonsense, n. The objections that are urged against this excellent dictionary.

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Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

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Dog - a kind of additional or subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship.

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HUMORIST, n. A plague that would have softened down the hoar austerity of Pharaoh's heart and persuaded him to dismiss Israel with his best wishes, cat-quick.

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LECTURER, n. One with his hand in your pocket, his tongue in your ear and his faith in your patience.

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ACCOMPLICE, n. One associated with another in a crime, having guilty knowledge and complicity, as an attorney who defends a criminal, knowing him guilty. This view of the attorney's position in the matter has not hitherto commanded the assent of attorneys, no one having offered them a fee for assenting.

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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

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UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.

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APOTHECARY, n. The physician's accomplice, undertaker's benefactor and grave worm's provider

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When publicly censured our first instinct is to make everybody a codefendant.

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Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.

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STORY, n. A narrative, commonly untrue.

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RECREATION, n. A particular kind of dejection to relieve a general fatigue.

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The god of the world's leading religion.

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