Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Friendship Quotes, Thinking Quotes

Think twice before you speak to a friend in need

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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.

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PLEONASM, n. An army of words escorting a corporal of thought.

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INJUSTICE, n. A burden which of all those that we load upon others and carry ourselves is lightest in the hands and heaviest upon the back.

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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.

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Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.

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ADAGE, n. Boned wisdom for weak teeth.

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LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used in giving stability to light lovers - particularly to those who love not wisely but other men's wives.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Love Quotes , Men Quotes

MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.

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DEJEUNER, n. The breakfast of an American who has been in Paris. Variously pronounced.

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VITUPERATION, n. Saite, as understood by dunces and all such as suffer from an impediment in their wit.

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Love, n. A temporary insanity curable by marriage or by removal of the patient from the influences under which he incurred the disorder. This disease, like caries and many other ailments, is prevalent only among civilized races living under artificial conditions; barbarous nations breathing pure air and eating simple food enjoy immunity from its ravages. It is sometimes fatal, but more frequently to the physician than to the patient.

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Intolerance is natural and logical, for in every dissenting opinion lies an assumption of superior wisdom.

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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

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Trial. A formal inquiry designed to prove and put upon record the blameless characters of judges, advocates and jurors.

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UNITARIAN, n. One who denies the divinity of a Trinitarian.

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ARSENIC, n. A kind of cosmetic greatly affected by the ladies, whom it greatly affects in turn.

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Battle, n., A method of untying with the teeth a political knot that would not yield to the tongue.

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NEPOTISM, n. Appointing your grandmother to office for the good of the party.

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Pantheism, n. The doctrine that everything is God, in contradistinction to the doctrine that God is everything.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Doctrine Quotes