Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Knights Quotes, Feet Quotes

MISERICORDE, n. A dagger which in mediaeval warfare was used by the foot soldier to remind an unhorsed knight that he was mortal.

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In forgiving an injury be somewhat ceremonious, lest your magnanimity be construed as indifference.

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There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

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Inhumanity, n. One of the signal and characteristic qualities of humanity.

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SATIRE, n. An obsolete kind of literary composition in which the vices and follies of the author's enemies were expounded with imperfect tenderness.

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A king's staff of office, the sign and symbol of his authority. It was originally a mace with which the sovereign admonished his jester and vetoed ministerial measures by breaking the bones of their proponents.

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self-esteem, n. An erroneous appraisal.

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Woman absent is woman dead.

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YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander. In the Southern States the word is unknown.

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CANNON, n. An instrument employed in the rectification of national boundaries.

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RIGHTEOUSNESS, n. A sturdy virtue that was once found among the Pantidoodles inhabiting the lower part of the peninsula of Oque. Some feeble attempts were made by returned missionaries to introduce it into several European countries . .

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Dance, v.i. To leap about to the sound of tittering music, preferably with arms about your neighbor's wife or daughter. There are many kinds of dances, but all those requiring the participation of the two sexes have two characteristics in common: they are conspicuously innocent, and warmly loved by the vicious.

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ASS, n. A public singer with a good voice but no ear.

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PHILISTINE, n. One whose mind is the creature of its environment, following the fashion in thought, feeling and sentiment. He is sometimes learned, frequently prosperous, commonly clean and always solemn.

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An archbishop is an ecclesiastical dignitary one point holier than a bishop.

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The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.

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PROVIDENTIAL, adj. Unexpectedly and conspicuously beneficial to the person so describing it.

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A chop is a piece of leather skillfully attached to a bone and administered to the patients at restaurants.

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LIMB, n. The branch of a tree or the leg of an American woman.

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Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.

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