Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Marriage Quotes, World Quotes

The world has suffered more from the ravages of ill-advised marriages than from virginity.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Marriage Quotes , World Quotes

An immaterial but visible being that inhabited the air when the air was an element and before it was fatally polluted with factory smoke, sewer gas and similar products of civilization.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Air Quotes , Civilization Quotes

WIDOW, n. A pathetic figure that the Christian world has agreed to take humorously, although Christ's tenderness towards widows was one of the most marked features of his character.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Christian Quotes , Character Quotes

A man is known by the company he organizes.

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Christian - One who follows the teachings of Christ insofar as they are not inconsistent with a life of sin.

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PASTIME, n. A device for promoting dejection. Gentle exercise for intellectual debility.

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aim, n. The task we set our wishes to.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wish Quotes , Desire Quotes

SCARABAEUS, n. The sacred beetle of the ancient Egyptians, allied to our familiar "tumble-bug." It was supposed to symbolize immortality, the fact that God knew why giving it its peculiar sanctity. Its habit of incubating its eggs in a ball of ordure may also have commended it to the favor of the priesthood, and may some day assure it an equal reverence among ourselves. True, the American beetle is an inferior beetle, but the American priest is an inferior priest.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Eggs Quotes , Giving Quotes

ORPHAN, n. A living person whom death has deprived of the power of filial ingratitude . . .

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MAN, n. An animal so lost in rapturous contemplation of what he thinks he is as to overlook what he indubitably ought to be.

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Think twice before you speak to a friend in need

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Don't board with the devil if you wish to be fat.

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PHONOGRAPH, n. An irritating toy that restores life to dead noises.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Noise Quotes

He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity. A fool is a natural proselyte, but he must be caught young, for his convictions, unlike those of the wise, harden with age.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wise Quotes , Believe Quotes

Intolerance is natural and logical, for in every dissenting opinion lies an assumption of superior wisdom.

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An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.

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MISERICORDE, n. A dagger which in mediaeval warfare was used by the foot soldier to remind an unhorsed knight that he was mortal.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Knights Quotes , Feet Quotes

DEINOTHERIUM, n. An extinct pachyderm that flourished when the Pterodactyl was in fashion. The latter was a native of Ireland, its name being pronounced Terry Dactyl or Peter O'Dactyl, as the man pronouncing it may chance to have heard it spoken or seen it printed.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Fashion Quotes , Men Quotes

Fidelity - a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Peculiar Quotes , Betrayed Quotes

TENACITY, n. A certain quality of the human hand in its relation to the coin of the realm. It attains its highest development in the hand of authority and is considered a serviceable equipment for a career in politics.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hands Quotes , Careers Quotes