Adam Carolla Quotes, Basketball Quotes, Brother Quotes

When you're picking a basketball team, you'll take the brother over the guy with the yarmulke. Why? Because you're playing the odds.

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Maybe it's weird, but I don't feel in any way, shape or form that I'm taking over his show.

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I'm not sexist, I'm just a realist.

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I had two thoughts about it. One was I could do that, and the next one was I'll never get to do that.

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I'm a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I'm into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.

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If women built the bridges or were meant to build the bridges, then they would have done it.

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The reason I hate publicists is because I think if we got rid of them everything would be on equal footing.

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I don't have anything against my mom, but my family has no emotional connection to each other.

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I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don't know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.

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[Giving welfare to poor people] is the equivalent of the government sending [fat people] a jumbo bag of Bugles in the mail twice a month.

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Rich people don't pay taxes? Of course they pay taxes - they pay tons in taxes. They pay for everyone else who doesn't pay taxes.

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People look at me, and they go, 'You're white, you're smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.'

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Everything seems overwhelming when you stand back and look at the totality of it. I build a lot of stuff and it would all seem impossible if I didn't break it down piece by piece, stage by stage. The best gift you can give yourself is some drive--that thing inside of you that gets you out the door to the gym, job interviews, and dates. The believe-in-yourself adage is grossly overrated.

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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It's a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.

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A lot of people would say, to be truthful is to tell all, every dalliance, every crisis. They might be right on paper, but in practice, it's not a great way to go.

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There are certain things women are better at than men.

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I don't know anything about computers.

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When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.

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We're all animals, that we all respond to the same stimuli. If you want to motivate somebody not to have premarital sex, or motivate black bears not to go diving into dumpsters, first you have to think about why they do it. Telling them to stop isn't going to help. There has to be some incentive for them to alter their behavior.

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I get depressed at airports.

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