Adam Carolla Quotes, Dream Quotes, People Quotes

People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Dream Quotes , People Quotes

Screw guilt -- I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn't bother me. I'm an atheist!

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Atheist Quotes , Sex Quotes

Everyone keeps saying, "Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating." It's like saying, "How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt?" I don't care.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Focus Quotes , Saving Quotes

I am semi-ambivalent about being on camera - sort of low-key. I don't like being on camera stuff that much. I like radio and live performing stuff. I don't like the television stuff as much. Some people do. It takes a certain breed of cat. There is a ton of pressure and you need to read cue cards. I am not a good cue card reader. Being a poor reader was enough to make me not want to do that type of formatted show.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Cat Quotes , People Quotes

I'm not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don't even want them to laugh half the time.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , People Quotes , Laughing Quotes

You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Names Quotes , Feelings Quotes

Should women be on any pills besides birth control? We should just give them all sugar pills for everything, they're so suggestible.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Want Quotes

I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Strong Quotes , Thinking Quotes

I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I'm not sure why.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Views Quotes , Land Quotes

If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you'll have a good life.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Dog Quotes , Good Life Quotes

I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Soccer Quotes , Coffee Quotes

You don't realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It's a card you get so you can navigate society.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Cards Quotes , Use Quotes

There's no bigger atheist than me. Well, I take that back. I'm a cancer screening away from going agnostic and a biopsy away from full-fledged Christian.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Christian Quotes , Atheist Quotes

I get depressed at airports.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes

I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they're making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Nice Quotes

I'm really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life. So, something that is potentially four months down the road is not just a mile down the road for me, it's a million miles down the road.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

All's the government should do is keep the taxes and regulations at a manageable rate, keep a decent standing army and get out of the way.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Army Quotes , Government Quotes

You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.

6 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes