Adam Carolla Quotes, Guy Quotes, Needs Quotes

I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Guy Quotes , Needs Quotes

I don't think I've ever seen pie advertised. That's how you know it's good. They advertise ice cream and other desserts. They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven't seen one pie commercial.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Pie Quotes

I'd be at someone's house or be up on the roof all day and I'd get lonely - stir crazy - and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life. But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn't imagine it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lonely Quotes

To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can't you do.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Important Quotes , Ability Quotes

Everyone in Hollywood thinks like a Republican fiscally by leaving town to shoot everything; they just don't vote that way.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Leaving Quotes

Honestly, I've always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed - that kind of stuff.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Bed Quotes , Stuff Quotes

The main thing that I learned from my horrible job experiences was how horrible they were.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Horrible Jobs Quotes

I didn't have any success in show business until I was 30 to 31 years of age.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Years Quotes , Age Quotes

I'm a doofus from the Valley, a blue-collar guy.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Blue Quotes , Guy Quotes

I don't like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it's the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they're pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Soccer Quotes , Coffee Quotes

The truth is we're all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else's book. We never pick up a brush and stand in front of our own easel.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Reading Quotes , Book Quotes

No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians; I'm just not a reader.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Book Quotes , Comedian Quotes

A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money. Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money - do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mean Quotes , Successful Quotes

It's something I've always kicked around, not doing the eBook but the Rich Man, Poor Man thing.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Men Quotes , Rich Quotes

In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Nice Quotes , Dirty Quotes

If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Media Quotes , Worried Quotes

Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sleep Quotes , Names Quotes

Everything seems overwhelming when you stand back and look at the totality of it. I build a lot of stuff and it would all seem impossible if I didn't break it down piece by piece, stage by stage. The best gift you can give yourself is some drive--that thing inside of you that gets you out the door to the gym, job interviews, and dates. The believe-in-yourself adage is grossly overrated.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Believe Quotes

Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , School Quotes , College Quotes

I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle. The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I'm not sure why.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Views Quotes , Land Quotes