Mark Twain Quotes, Horse Quotes, Should Quotes

If horses knew their strength we should not ride anymore.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , Should Quotes

Do not undervalue the headache. While it is at its sharpest it seems a bad investment; but when relief begins, the unexpired remainder is worth $4 a minute.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pain Quotes , Relief Quotes

A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditchdigging. It is the insanest of all recreations. The inventor of it overlooked no detail that could furnish weariness, distress, harassment, and acute and long-sustained misery of mind and body.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Food Quotes , Long Quotes

If ignorance is bliss, why isn't the world happier?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , World Quotes

Now I can only pray that there may be a God -- and a heaven -- or something better.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Heaven Quotes

We love old travelers: we love to hear them prate, drivel and lie; we love them for their asinine vanity, their ability to bore, their luxuriant fertility of imagination, their startling, brilliant, overwhelming mendacity.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Travel Quotes , Lying Quotes

We like a man to come right out and say what he thinks- if we agree with him.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Relationship Quotes , Men Quotes

Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion - several of them.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Atheist Quotes

Constellations have always been troublesome things to name. If you give one of them a fanciful name, it will always refuse to live up to it; it will always persist in not resembling the thing it has been named for.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Names Quotes , Giving Quotes

As to the adjective: when in doubt, strike it out.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Doubt Quotes

Some civilized women would lose half their charm without dress and some would lose all of it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dresses Quotes , Half Quotes

The humorous story is told gravely; the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Crafts Quotes

It is a good idea to obey all the rules when you're young just so you'll have the strength to break them when you're old.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ideas Quotes , Breaking Rules Quotes

To succeed in the other trades, capacity must be shown; in the law, concealment of it will do.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

...we all know that in all matters of mere opinion that [every] man is insane-just as insane as we are...we know exactly where to put our finger upon his insanity: it is where his opinion differs from ours....All Democrats are insane, but not one of them knows it. None but the Republicans. All the Republicans are insane, but only the Democrats can perceive it. The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Perfect Quotes

Love is not a product of reasonings and statistics. It just comes-none knows whence-and cannot explain itself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Knowing Quotes

Canadian girls are so pretty it's a relief now and then to see a plain one.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Girl Quotes , Relief Quotes

Everytime I read 'Pride and Prejudice' I want to dig her up and beat her over the skull with her own shin-bone.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pride Quotes , Skulls Quotes

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Religious Quotes

You cannot have a theory without principles. Principles is another name for prejudices.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Names Quotes , Principles Quotes