Mark Twain Quotes, Heaven Quotes, Bartender Quotes

Every time I read a Jane Austen novel, I feel like a bartender at the gates of heaven.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heaven Quotes , Bartender Quotes

Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I simply can´t resist a cat, particularly a purring one. They are the cleanest, cunningest, and most intelligent things I know, outside of the girl you love, of course.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Girl Quotes , Cat Quotes

Chastity - you can carry it too far.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes

when you recollect something which belonged in an earlier chapter, do not go back, but jam it in where you are . Discursiveness does not hurt an autobiography in the least.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hurt Quotes , Doe Quotes

The minute we get reconciled to a person, how willing we are to throw aside little needless punctilios and pronounce his name right.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Names Quotes , Littles Quotes

Saturday morning was come, and all the summer world was bright and fresh, and brimming with life. There was a song in every heart; and if the heart was young, the music issued at the lips. There was cheer in every face and a spring in every step. The locust-trees were in bloom, and the fragrance of the blossoms filled the air. Cardiff Hill, beyond the village and above, it was green with vegetation, and it lay just far enough away to seem a Delectable Land, dreamy, reposeful, and inviting.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Summer Quotes , Song Quotes

Who are we to create a heaven and hell for ourselves, excluding animals and plants in the bargain, just because we have the power to rationalize?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Animal Quotes , Heaven Quotes

Agassiz does recommend authors to eat fish, because the phosphorus in it makes brains. But I cannot help you to a decision about the amount you need to eat. Perhaps a couple of whales would be enough.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Couple Quotes , Whales Quotes

The idea that no gentleman ever swears is all wrong. He can swear and still be a gentleman if he does it in a nice and benevolent and affectionate way.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Nice Quotes

There is nothing more frustrating than a good example.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Example Quotes , Frustrating Quotes

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiring Quotes

There are German songs which can make a stranger to the language cry.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Song Quotes , Language Quotes

A Christian's first duty is to God. It then follows, as a matter of course, that it is his duty to carry his Christian code to the polls and vote them... If Christians should vote their duty to God at the polls, they would carry every election, and do it with ease... it would bring about a moral revolution that would be incalculably beneficent. It would save the country.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Christian Quotes , Country Quotes

Public opinion is held in reverence. It settles everything. Some think it is the voice of God.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Thinking Quotes

In the laboratory there are no fustian ranks, no brummagem aristocracies; the domain of Science is a republic, and all its citizens are brothers and equals, its princes of Monaco and its stonemasons of Cromarty meeting, barren of man-made gauds and meretricious decorations, upon the one majestic level!

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Brother Quotes , Science Quotes

Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself; in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lying Quotes

Travel has no longer any charm for me. I have seen all the foreign countries I want to except heaven & hell & I have only a vague curiosity about one of those.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Travel Quotes

Experience of life (not of books) is the only capital usable in such a book as you have attempted; one can make no judicious use of this capital while it is new.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Writing Quotes

I think that the reason why we Americans seem to be so addicted to trying to get rich suddenly is merely because the opportunity to make promising efforts in that direction has offered itself to us with a frequency out of all proportion to the European experience.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Opportunity Quotes , Thinking Quotes