Mark Twain Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Never knew before what eternity was made for. It is to give some of us a chance to learn German.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , German Language Quotes , Giving Quotes

What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Business Quotes , Play Quotes

The Autocrat of Russia possesses more power than any other man in the earth; but he cannot stop a sneeze.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Russia Quotes

The common eye sees only the outside of things, and judges by that, but the seeing eye pierces through and reads the heart and the soul, finding there capacities which the outside didn't indicate or promise, and which the other kind of eye couldn't detect.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heart Quotes , Eye Quotes

I would not rob you of your food or your clothes or your umbrella, but if I caught your German out I would take it. But I don't study any more,- I have given it up.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Clothes Quotes , Study Quotes

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Thinking Quotes

To arrive at a just estimate of a renowned man's character one must judge it by the standards of his time, not ours.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Memories Quotes , Character Quotes

I am not one of those who in expressing opinions confine themselves to facts.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Science Quotes , Facts Quotes

There are those who scoff at the schoolboy, calling him frivolous and shallow: Yet it was the schoolboy who said 'Faith is believing what you know ain't so'.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Calling Quotes

Education is what you must acquire without any interference from your schooling.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Education Quotes , Schooling Quotes

Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Integrity Quotes , Real Quotes

...the circumstances and the atmosphere always have so much to do in directing a conversation, especially a German conversation, which is only a kind of an insurrection, anyway.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Atmosphere Quotes , Language Quotes

Next to possessing genius one's self is the power of appreciating it in others.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Power Quotes , Self Quotes

What is there that confers the noblest delight? What is that which swells a man's breast with pride above that which any other experience can bring to him? Discovery!

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pride Quotes , Men Quotes

A powerful agent is the right word: it lights the reader's way and makes it plain.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Powerful Quotes , Light Quotes

Anybody can have ideas-the difficulty is to express them without squandering a quire of paper on an idea that ought to be reduced to one glittering paragraph.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Plain Language Quotes

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Respect Quotes , Life Changing Quotes

I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Glasses Quotes , Hypocrisy Quotes