Mark Twain Quotes, Sarcastic Quotes, Inspiration Quotes

I could never learn to like her, except on a raft at sea with no other provisions in sight.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

No God and no religion can survive ridicule. No political church, no nobility, no royalty or other fraud, can face ridicule in a fair field, and live.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Political Quotes

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happy Birthday Quotes , Growing Up Quotes

The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kings Quotes , Editors Quotes

A public library is the most enduring of memorials, the trustiest monument for the preservation of an event or a name or an affection; for it, and it only, is respected by wars and revolutions, and survives them.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , War Quotes , Names Quotes

What's the use you learning to do right , when it's troublesome to do right and it ain't no trouble to do wrong, and the wages is just the same?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Use Quotes , Wages Quotes

It is just like man's vanity and impertinence to call an animal dumb because it is dumb to his dull perceptions. Heaven is by favor; if it were by merit your dog would go in and you would stay out. Of all the creatures ever made he (man) is the most detestable. Of the entire brood, he is the only one...that possesses malice. He is the only creature that inflicts pain for sport, knowing it to be pain. The fact that man knows right from wrong proves his intellectual superiority to the other creatures; but the fact that he can do wrong proves his moral inferiority to any creature that cannot.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sports Quotes , Dog Quotes

Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eccentric Quotes , Virtue Quotes

Education that consists in learning things and not the meaning of them is feeding upon the husks and not the corn

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Corn Quotes

Do your duty today and repent tomorrow.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Advice Quotes , Today Quotes

Is a person's public and private opinion the same? It is thought there have been instances.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Opinion Quotes , Instance Quotes

Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Success Quotes

I have criticized absent people so often, and then discovered, to my humiliation, that I was talking with their relatives, that I have grown superstitious about that sort of thing and dropped it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Discovery Quotes , Talking Quotes

Now what I contend is that my body is my own, at least I have always so regarded it. If I do harm through my experimenting with it, it is I who suffer, not the state.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Suffering Quotes , Body Quotes

Simple rules for saving money: To save half, when you are fired by an eager impulse to contribute to a charity, wait and count to forty. To save three quarters, count sixty. To save all, count sixty-five.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Simple Quotes , Waiting Quotes

I purpose publishing these Letters here in the world before I return to you. Two editions. One, unedited, for Bible readers and their children; the other, expurgated, for persons of refinement

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Children Quotes

I believe I have had the most trouble with a portrait which I painted in installments - the head on one canvas and the bust on another.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Portraits Quotes

And always we had wars, and more wars, and still other wars - all over Europe, all over the world. "Sometimes in the private interest of royal families," Satan said, "sometimes to crush a weak nation; but never a war started by the aggressor for any clean purpose - there is no such war in the history of the race."

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Crush Quotes , War Quotes

Supposing is good, but finding out is better.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Learning Quotes , Science Quotes

You have noticed that the human being is a curiosity. In times past he has had (and worn out and flung away) hundreds and hundreds of religions; today he has hundreds and hundreds of religions, and launches not fewer than three new ones every year. I could enlarge on that number and still be within the facts.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Past Quotes , Years Quotes