Mark Twain Quotes, Clever Quotes, Law Quotes

A good lawyer knows the law; a clever one takes the judge to lunch.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Clever Quotes , Law Quotes

An occasional compliment is necessary to keep up one's self-respect.

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It is no harm to be an ass, if one is content to bray and not kick.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A wanton waste of projectiles.

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The most permanent lessons in morals are those which come, not of book teaching, but of experience.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Teaching Quotes

It is governed by minorities, seldom or never by majorities. It suppresses its feelings and its beliefs and follows the handful that makes the most noise. Sometimes the noisy handful is right, sometimes wrong, but no matter, the crowd follows it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Animal Quotes , Feelings Quotes

I simply can't resist a cat, particularly a purring one.

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New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Epic Quotes , Drawing Quotes

I hate editors, for they make me abandon a lot of perfectly good English words.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hate Quotes , Perfectly Good Quotes

If you tell the truth you do not need a good memory!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , Honesty Quotes

Patriotism is usually the refuge of the scoundrel. He is the man who talks the loudest.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Patriotism Quotes

The vast majority of the race whether savage or civilized, are secretly kind at heart and shrink from inflicting pain, but in the presence of the aggressive and pitiless minority they don't dare to assert themselves.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pain Quotes , Heart Quotes

Every man is a moon and has a side which he turns toward nobody: you have to slip around behind it if you want to see it.

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Everything human is pathetic

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A soiled baby with a neglected nose cannot be conscientiously regarded as a thing of beauty.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Beauty Quotes , Baby Quotes

God, so atrocious in the Old Testament, so attractive in the New--the Jekyl and Hyde of sacred romance.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Romance Quotes

I have not professionally dealt in truth. Many when they come to die have spent all the truth that was in them, and enter the next world as paupers. I have saved up enough to make an astonishment there.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

A man who is not born with the novel-writing gift has a troublesome time of it when he tries to build a novel. I know this from experience. He has no clear idea of his story; in fact he has no story. He merely has some people in his mind, and an incident or two, also a locality, and he trusts he can plunge those people into those incidents with interesting results.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Men Quotes

First catch your Boer, then kick him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Boers Quotes , Firsts Quotes