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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- ADDER, n. A species of snake. So called from its habit of adding funeral outlays to the other expenses of living.
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- Habit: A shackle for the free.
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- predilection, n. The preparatory stage of disillusion.
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- AFFLICTION, n. An acclimatizing process preparing the soul for another and bitter world.
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- There was never a genius who was not thought a fool until he disclosed himself; whereas he is a fool then only.
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- Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.
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- SACRED, adj. Dedicated to some religious purpose; having a divine character; inspiring solemn thoughts or emotions; as... the Cow in India; the Crocodile, the Cat and the Onion of ancient Egypt.
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- Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property subject to private ownership and control is the foundation of modern society, and is eminently worthy of the superstructure.
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- I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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- PHRENOLOGY, n. The science of picking the pocket through the scalp. It consists in locating and exploiting the organ that one is a dupe with.
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- Glutton- A person who escapes the evils of moderation by committing dyspepsia.
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- Confidante: One entrusted by A with the secrets of B confided to herself by C.
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- Least said is soon disavowed.
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- A single swallow, it is said, devours ten millions of insects every year. The supplying of these insects I take to be a signal instance of the Creator's bounty in providing for the lives of His creatures.
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- OSTRICH, n. A large bird to which (for its sins, doubtless) nature has denied that hinder toe . . . . The absence of a good working pair of wings is no defect, for, as has been ingeniously pointed out, the ostrich does not fly.
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- DIGESTION, n. The conversion of victuals into virtues. When the process is imperfect, vices are evolved instead - a circumstance from which that wicked writer, Dr. Jeremiah Blenn, infers that the ladies are the greater sufferers from dyspepsia.
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- Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.
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- EXCEPTION, n. A thing which takes the liberty to differ from other things of its class, as an honest man, a truthful woman, etc.
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- RUIN, v. To destroy. Specifically, to destroy a maid's belief in the virtue of maids.
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- The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of remarkable Christian forbearance among men - were it not for a mawkish humanitarianism, coupled with imperfect digestive powers, we should devour our young, as Nature intended.
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