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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- AUSTRALIA, n. A country lying in the South Sea, whose industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or an island.
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- RESPIRATOR, n. An apparatus fitted over the nose and mouth of an inhabitant of London, whereby to filter the visible universe in its passage to the lungs.
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- Dictionary: a malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic
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- Christians and camels receive their burdens kneeling.
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- When lost in a forest go always down hill. When lost in a philosophy or doctrine go upward.
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- Politeness, n: The most acceptable hypocrisy.
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- Behavior, n. Conduct, as determined, not by principle, but by breeding.
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- International arbitration may be defined as the substitution of many burning questions for a smoldering one
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- R.I.P. A careless abbreviation of "requiescat in pace", attesting to indolent goodwill to the dead. According to the learned Dr. Drigge, however, the letters originally meant nothing more than "reductus in pulvis".
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- Salamander: Originally a reptile inhabiting fire; later, an anthropomorphous immortal, but still a pyrophile. Salamanders are now believed to be extinct, the last one of which we have an account having been seen in Carcassonne by the Abbe Belloc, who exorcised it with a bucket of holy water.
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- Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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- me, pro. The objectionable case of I. The personal pronoun in English has three cases, the dominative, the objectionable and the oppressive. Each is all three.
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- PAST, n. That part of Eternity with some small fraction of which we have a slight and regrettable acquaintance... The Past is the Future of yesterday, the Future is the Past of to-morrow. They are one - the knowledge and the dream.
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- Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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- Consult: To seek approval for a course of action already decided upon.
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- I was born to poor because of honest parents.
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- Hypocrisy: prejudice with a halo.
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- Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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- Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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- REPRESENTATIVE, n. In national politics, a member of the Lower House in this world, and without discernible hope of promotion in the next.
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