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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- pleasure, n. The least hateful form of dejection.
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- Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
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- History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
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- NOTORIETY, n. The fame of one's competitor for public honors. The kind of renown most accessible and acceptable to mediocrity. A Jacob's-ladder leading to the vaudeville stage, with angels ascending and descending.
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- Insurrection. An unsuccessful revolution; disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad government.
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- While you have a future do not live too much in contemplation of your past: unless you are content to walk backward the mirror is a poor guide.
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- CLERGYMAN, n. A man who undertakes the management of our spiritual affairs as a method of better his temporal ones.
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- I think love is the most unbelievable, and critical, thing in civilization. Everything else is very mechanical and predictable, but love, you can't catch it.
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- art, n. This word has no definition.
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- REPLICA, n. A reproduction of a work of art, by the artist that made the original. It is so called to distinguish it from a "copy," which is made by another artist. When the two are mae with equal skill the replica is the more valuable, for it is suppose
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- IMPALE, v.t. In popular usage, to pierce with any weapon which remains fixed in the wound . . . . properly, to put to death by thrusting an upright sharp stake into the body, the victim being left in a sitting position.
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- Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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- alone, adj. In bad company.
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- Botany, n. The science of vegetables - those that are not good to eat, as well as those that are. It deals largely with their flowers, which are commonly badly designed, inartistic in color, and ill-smelling.
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- Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.
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- A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.
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- EFFECT, n. The second of two phenomena which always occur together in the same order. The first, called a Cause, is said to generate the other-which is no more sensible than it would be for one who has never seen a dog except in pursuit of a rabbit to declare the rabbit the cause of the dog.
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- Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.
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- R.I.P. A careless abbreviation of "requiescat in pace", attesting to indolent goodwill to the dead. According to the learned Dr. Drigge, however, the letters originally meant nothing more than "reductus in pulvis".
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- Admiral. That part of a warship which does the talking while the figurehead does the thinking.
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