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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
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- Slang is a foul pool at which every dunce fills his bucket, and then sets up as a fountain.
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- IMPALE, v.t. In popular usage, to pierce with any weapon which remains fixed in the wound . . . . properly, to put to death by thrusting an upright sharp stake into the body, the victim being left in a sitting position.
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- Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
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- General," said the commander of the delinquent brigade, "I am persuaded that any further display of valor by my troops will bring them into collision with the enemy.
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- IMPENITENCE, n. A state of mind intermediate in point of time between sin and punishment.
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- actually, adv. Perhaps; possibly.
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- Happiness is lost by criticizing it; sorrow by accepting it.
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- Male, A member of the unconsidered or negligible gender. The male of the human race is commonly known to the female as Mere Man. The Genus has two varieties: good providers and bad providers.
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- aim, n. The task we set our wishes to.
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- To renounce an honor for an advantage. To renounce an advantage for a greater advantage.
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- When prosperous the fool trembles for the evil that is to come; in adversity the philosopher smiles for the good that he has had.
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- ASPERSE, v.t. Maliciously to ascribe to another vicious actions which one has not had the temptation and opportunity to commit.
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- Think twice before you speak to a friend in need
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- The place whereon the priest formerly raveled out the small intestine of the sacrificial victim for purposes of divination and cooked its flesh for the gods. The word is now seldom used, except with reference to the sacrifice of their liberty and peace by a male and a female fool.
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- Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.
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- HASH: There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is.
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- RUSSIAN, n. A person with a Caucasian body and a Mongolian soul. A Tartar Emetic.
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- GRAVE, n. A place in which the dead are laid to await the coming of the medical student.
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- PHYSIOGNOMY, n. The art of determining the character of another by the resemblances and differences between his face and our own, which is the standard of excellence.
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