Adam Carolla Quotes, Thinking Quotes, Audience Quotes

I think if you create something and you get an audience for it, then the monetization part is really secondary.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Audience Quotes

Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Focus Quotes , Saving Quotes

I want to work for myself, and I do work for myself. I make plenty of money working for myself.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Want Quotes

I used to be a Democrat, now I'm basically a Republican.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Republican Quotes , Used Quotes

I don't think healthcare's a right. The only right you have is the ability to go out on an even playing field and work, and then purchase health insurance, or whatever it is.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Fields Quotes

I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I've worked with women, I've never had an issue with women.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Daughter Quotes , Mother Quotes

When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the 'tardiest of the 'tards like the thick crust.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Country Quotes , Feet Quotes

In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money… and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn’t very good at it.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Nice Quotes , Dirty Quotes

I guess my feeling is that if you’re going to make a joke, that’s fine, but you should also sort of stand behind it, you know? A joke should be more than a joke, it should be a point that you’re trying to make.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Feelings Quotes , Trying Quotes

If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they'd be off TV. They're not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we'd know who she was?

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Thinking Quotes , Joy Quotes

You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Accomplishment Quotes , Feel Good Quotes

When I say things that sound insane, like only the smartest million people should have the right to vote, well, I mean that.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mean Quotes , Should Have Quotes

If you are tuning in just for the show, you're going to be sorely disappointed.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

No, I had not read any other comedian's book. Not that I don't enjoy other comedians; I'm just not a reader.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Book Quotes , Comedian Quotes

I'm like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Guy Quotes , Needs Quotes

Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you're gay.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Gay Quotes , Looks Quotes

I have no connection with Hollywood. I'm not interested. I don't care.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Hollywood Quotes , Connections Quotes

As I said in my last book, birds are mean. They're the only pet that, when they escape, the owners are relieved. You can tell a species is evil by doing this simple math. If my blond lab Molly was the size of T-Rex, that would just mean more kibble, more work for the gardener in the backyard, and a harder time moving her to my wife's side of the bed at night. If birds were the size of a T-Rex, the streets would be littered with human remains.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Moving Quotes , Book Quotes

Speaking of sleeping bags, has anything ever had a less creative name?

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sleep Quotes , Names Quotes

My motto is "more mystery, less history".

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mystery Quotes , Motto Quotes