Mark Twain Quotes, Horse Quotes, Believe Quotes

I speak French with timidity, and not flowingly--except when excited. When using that language I have often noticed that I have hardly ever been mistaken for a Frenchman, except, perhaps, by horses; never, I believe, by people.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , Believe Quotes

That's the difference between governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Government Quotes , Differences Quotes

The statesmen will invent cheap lies, putting the blame upon the nation that is attacked, and every man will be glad of those conscience-soothing falsities, and will diligently study them, and refuse to examine any refutations of them; and thus he will by and by convince himself that the war is just, and will thank God for the better sleep he enjoys after this process of grotesque self-deception.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Peace Quotes , Truth Quotes

It is easy to make plans in this world; even a cat can do it; and when one is out in those remote oceans it is noticeable that a cat's plans and a man's are worth about the same. There is much the same shrinkage in both, in the matter of values.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ocean Quotes , Cat Quotes

Wherefore, I beseech you let the dog and the onions and these people of the strange and godless names work out their several salvations from their piteous and wonderful difficulties without help of mine, for indeed their trouble is sufficient as it is, whereas an I tried to help I should but damage their cause the more and yet mayhap not live myself to see the desolation wrought.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dog Quotes , Math Quotes

It's so damned humiliating.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , History Quotes

Nothing agrees with me. If I drink coffee, it gives me dyspepsia; if I drink wine, it gives me the gout; if I go to church, it gives me dysentery.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Coffee Quotes , Wine Quotes

Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the company!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Men Quotes

Self-approval is acquired mainly from the approval of other people.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Approval Of Others Quotes , Self Quotes

They do say that when a man starts down hill everybody is ready to help him with a kick, and I suppose it is so.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Luck Quotes

Mine was a trained Presbyterian conscience and knew but the one duty - to hunt and harry its slave upon all pretexts and on all occasions, particularly when there was no sense nor reason in it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Atheism Quotes , Slave Quotes

Against a diseased imagination demonstration goes for nothing.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Imagination Quotes , Atheism Quotes

This is the only sane clerical the earthquake has exposed to view yet.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Views Quotes , Earthquakes Quotes

I do not allow my schooling to interfere with my education

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Schooling Quotes

When you catch an adjective, kill it - perhaps the best possible advice for budding writers.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Advice Quotes

Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts and happenings. It consists mainly ofthe storm of thought that is forever flowing through one's head.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Life Quotes

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but the fly comes close.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Religious Quotes

Whatever you have lived, you can write & by hard work & a genuine apprenticeship, you can learn to write well; but what you have not lived you cannot write, you can only pretend to write it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hard Work Quotes , Writing Quotes

A pilot must have a memory developed to absolute perfection. But there are two higher qualities which he also must have. He must have good and quick judgment and decision, and a cool, calm courage that no peril can shake.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Memories Quotes , Two Quotes

Is it, perhaps, possible that there are two kinds of Civilization-one for home consumption and one for the heathen market?

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Home Quotes , Civilization Quotes