Oscar Wilde Quotes, Funny Quotes, Music Quotes

Music makes one feel so romantic - at least it always gets on one's nerves - which is the same thing nowadays.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Music Quotes

Only the shallow know themselves.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

I look to nature because I think the animals are smarter than we are. Animals mate; humans date. There's no dating in the animal kingdom. No dinner, no movie - just a quick sniff, 'Alright, let's go.'

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

If you are tuning in just for the show, you're going to be sorely disappointed.

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.

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Tags : Oprah Winfrey Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

There is more to be said for stupidity than people imagine. Personally I have a great admiration for stupidity. It is a sort of fellow-feeling, I suppose.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , People Quotes

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Dombey and Son had often dealt in hides, but never in hearts. They left that fancy ware to boys and girls, and boarding-schools and books. Mr. Dombey would have reasoned: That a matrimonial alliance with himself must, in the nature of things, be gratifying and honourable to any woman of common sense. That the hope of giving birth to a new partner in such a house, could not fail to awaken a glorious and stirring ambition in the breast of the least ambitious of her sex.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Girl Quotes

A joke is a very serious thing.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Historians are like deaf people who go on answering questions that no one has asked them.

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Tags : Leo Tolstoy Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I think war is a dangerous place.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Peace Quotes

But the peasants - how do the peasants die?

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Tags : Leo Tolstoy Quotes , Funny Quotes , Death Quotes

Avoid all needle drugs, the only dope worth shooting is Richard Nixon.

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Tags : Abbie Hoffman Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dope Quotes

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiring Quotes

Girl who sit on Judge's lap get honorable discharge.

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Tags : Confucius Quotes , Funny Quotes , Girl Quotes

I want to go ahead of Father Time with a scythe of my own.

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Tags : H. G. Wells Quotes , Funny Quotes , New Year Quotes

Poetry's unnat'ral; no man ever talked poetry 'cept a beadle on boxin' day, or Warren's blackin' or Rowland's oil, or some o' them low fellows; never you let yourself down to talk poetry, my boy.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

There has been much tragedy in my life; at least half of it actually happened.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Do the right thing. It will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Work Quotes