William Shakespeare Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes

Farewell, fair cruelty.

4 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Happy Birthday Quotes

Then, at the end of every hand, Miss Bolo would inquire with a dismal countenance and reproachful sigh, why Mr. Pickwick had not returned that diamond, or led the club, or roughed the spade, or finessed the heart, or led through the honour, or brought out the ace, or played up to the king, or some such thing; and in reply to all these grave charges, Mr. Pickwick would be wholly unable to plead any justification whatever, having by this time forgotten all about the game.

4 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kings Quotes

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

If you look at a group of people that had faith, it's got to be the Jews. They followed Moses through the desert for 40 years with no map. There had to be one guy in the back, like, 'I don't think he knows where he's going.'

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Mr. Bazzard's father, being a Norfolk farmer, would have furiously laid about him with a flail, a pitch-fork, and every agricultural implement available for assaulting purposes, on the slightest hint of his son's having written a play.

4 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes

Being in a relationship is like being in A.A. My friends ask me, 'How's it going with that girl?' 'One day at a time, man.'

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Girl Quotes

The French complain of everything, and always.

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Tags : Napoleon Bonaparte Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Whenever people agree with me I always feel I must be wrong.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.

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Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

Americans spend 6 billion hours a year filling out their tax reforms.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

I don't recognize you - I've changed a lot.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Americans are like a rich father who wishes he knew how to give his son the hardships that made him rich.

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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes

Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I have imbibed such a love for money that I keep some sequins in a drawer to count, and cry over them once a week.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

I am only human, although I regret it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Regret Quotes

Fifteen referees. I want fifteen referees to be at this fight because there ain't no one man who can keep up with the pace I'm gonna set except me. There's not a man alive who can whup me. I'm too fast. I'm too smart. I'm too pretty. I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked.

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Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Smart Quotes

Had double chins all the way down to his stomach.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

We are living in 1937, and our universities, I suggest, are not half-way out of the fifteenth century. We have made hardly any changes in our conception of university organization, education, graduation, for a century - for several centuries.

4 years ago

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Tags : H. G. Wells Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes