Mahatma Gandhi Quotes, Funny Quotes, Sarcastic Quotes

What do I think of Western civilization? I think it would be a very good idea.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mahatma Gandhi Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Morning Quotes

I've got a hockey record, I took off my skate and tried to stab a guy, I'm the only person who ever tried that.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Sandler Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hockey Quotes

I could have become a soldier if I had waited; I knew more about retreating than the man who invented retreating.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Military Quotes

We make our friends; we make our enemies; but God makes our next door neighbour.

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes

When the ax came into the forest the trees said the handle is one of us.

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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Tree Quotes

If you are out to describe the truth, leave elegance to the tailor.

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.

6 years ago

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Tags : Abba Eban Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Never confuse movement with action.

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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

If you cry ''Forward'' you must be sure to make clear the direction in which to go. Don't you see that if you fail to do that and simply call out the word to a monk and a revolutionary, they will go in precisely opposite directions?

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Tags : Anton Chekhov Quotes , Funny Quotes , Failure Quotes

Biography lends to death a new terror.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Writing Quotes

I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Riches are for spending.

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Tags : Francis Bacon Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

The great commander, who seemed by expression of his visage to be always on the look-out for something in the extremest distance, and to have no ocular knowledge of anything within ten miles, made no reply whatever.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Distance Quotes

Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes

There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.

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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

How marriage ruins a man! It is as demoralizing as cigarettes, and far more expensive.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

AUSTRALIA, n. A country lying in the South Sea, whose industrial and commercial development has been unspeakably retarded by an unfortunate dispute among geographers as to whether it is a continent or an island.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Country Quotes

Men marry women with the hope they will never change. Women marry men with the hope they will change. Invariably they are both disappointed.

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes