Victor Hugo Quotes, Funny Quotes, Wisdom Quotes

Fashions have done more harm than revolutions.

5 years ago

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Tags : Victor Hugo Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wisdom Quotes

I love Americans, but not when they try to talk French. What a blessing it is that they never try to talk English.

5 years ago

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Tags : Hector Hugh Munro Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait.

6 years ago

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Tags : A. Whitney Brown Quotes , Funny Quotes , Military Quotes

It is perfectly monstrous,' he said, at last, 'the way people go about nowadays saying things against one behind one's back that are absolutely and entirely true.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kings Quotes

Although always prepared for martyrdom, I preferred that it should be postponed.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Military Quotes

The only way to comprehend what mathematicians mean by Infinity is to contemplate the extent of human stupidity.

5 years ago

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hilarious Quotes

If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone's feelings unintentionally.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

We'll love you just the way you are if you're perfect.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alanis Morissette Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

You're 28, why are you going to goth clubs? Do what I do, sit at home & wait to die. You don't have to kill yourself, you're just waiting.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Home Quotes

Now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Fifteen referees. I want fifteen referees to be at this fight because there ain't no one man who can keep up with the pace I'm gonna set except me. There's not a man alive who can whup me. I'm too fast. I'm too smart. I'm too pretty. I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked.

5 years ago

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Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Smart Quotes

At fifteen, my mind was bent on learning. At thirty, I stood firm. At forty, I had no doubts. At fifty, I knew the decrees of Heaven. At sixty, my ear was receptive to truth. At seventy, I could follow my heart's desires without sin.

5 years ago

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Tags : Confucius Quotes , Funny Quotes , Birthday Quotes

His money is twice tainted: taint yours and taint mine.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Money Quotes

You don't ever ask a barber whether you need a haircut.

5 years ago

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Tags : Warren Buffett Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Never refuse to do a kindness unless the act would work great injury to yourself, and never refuse to take a drink - under any circumstances.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kindness Quotes

... Waiter! raw beef-steak for the gentleman's eye,-nothing like raw beef-steak for a bruise, sir; cold lamp-post very good, but lamp-post inconvenient-damned odd standing in the open street half-an-hour, with your eye against a lamp.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

It being a part of Mrs. Pipchin's system not to encourage a child's mind to develop and expand itself like a young flower, but to open it by force like an oyster.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Children Quotes