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Funny Quotes
Funny Quotes
957
If you could see my legs when I take my boots off, you'd form some idea of what unrequited affection is.
5 years ago
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Charles Dickens Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Humorous Quotes
You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
6 years ago
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Adam Carolla Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Humor Quotes
You can't imagine what a pleasure this complete laziness is to me: not a thought in my brain- you might send a ball rolling through it!
5 years ago
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Leo Tolstoy Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Sloth Quotes
I've taken my fun where I've found it, An' now I must pay for my fun, For the more you 'ave known o' the others The less will you settle to one.
5 years ago
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Rudyard Kipling Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Marriage Quotes
It's not because John McCain doesn't care. It's because John McCain doesn't get it.
5 years ago
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Barack Obama Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Sarcastic Quotes
What is wrong with the prosaic Englishman is what is wrong with the prosaic men of all countries: stupidity.
5 years ago
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George Bernard Shaw Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Country Quotes
The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.
6 years ago
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Mark Twain Quotes
, Inspirational Quotes
, Funny Quotes
The role of humour is to make people fall down and writhe on the Axminster, and that is the top and bottom of it.
6 years ago
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Alan Coren Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Fall Quotes
The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.
5 years ago
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Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes
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The superfluous, a very necessary thing.
5 years ago
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Voltaire Quotes
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Nothing can confound a wise man more than laughter from a dunce.
5 years ago
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Lord Byron Quotes
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, Happiness Quotes
I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.
6 years ago
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Mark Twain Quotes
, Inspirational Quotes
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Great art is the contempt of a great man for small art.
5 years ago
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F. Scott Fitzgerald Quotes
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Accidents will occur in the best regulated families.
5 years ago
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Charles Dickens Quotes
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It is a curious fact that people are never so trivial as when they take themselves seriously
5 years ago
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Oscar Wilde Quotes
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I sincerely want to meet the girl that was meant for me, but I want to sleep with the girls that weren't.
6 years ago
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Adam Ferrara Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Girl Quotes
Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.
5 years ago
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, God Quotes
I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed man.
5 years ago
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Oscar Wilde Quotes
, Funny Quotes
, Humor Quotes
Sure there have been injuries and deaths in boxing - but none of them serious.
6 years ago
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Alan Minter Quotes
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, Sports Quotes
At 50, a man can be an ass without being an optimist but not an optimist without being an ass
6 years ago
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Mark Twain Quotes
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