Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Hands Quotes, Tree Quotes

Riven and torn with cannon-shot, the trunks of the trees protruded bunches of splinters like hands, the fingers above the wound interlacing with those below.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hands Quotes , Tree Quotes

Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Book Quotes , Ignorance Quotes

Calamities are of two kinds: misfortunes to ourselves, and good fortune to others.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Jealousy Quotes

aim, n. The task we set our wishes to.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wish Quotes , Desire Quotes

Acquaintance. A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Friendship Quotes , Enough Quotes

ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A man in bed or a cabbage in the pot is not considered as having a zenith, though Horizontalists hold that the posture of the body was immaterial.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Heaven Quotes

LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose; without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg "pate".

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Nature Quotes , Bird Quotes

Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Giving Quotes , Advice Quotes

predilection, n. The preparatory stage of disillusion.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Disappointment Quotes , Stage Quotes

A statesman who shakes the fruit trees of his neighbors - to dislodge the worms.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Tree Quotes , Fruit Quotes

Heathen, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Fear Quotes , Worship Quotes

Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) and Mister (Mr.) are the three most distinctly disagreeable words in the language, in sound and sense.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Missing Quotes , Sound Quotes

Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Cooking Quotes

Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Birthday Quotes , Errors Quotes

Every patriot believes his country better than any other country . . . In its active manifestation-it is fond of killing-patriotism would be well enough if it were simply defensive, but it is also aggressive . . . Patriotism deliberately and with folly aforethought subordinates the interests of a whole to the interests of a part . . . Patriotism is fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave and blind as a stone.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , War Quotes

RATTLESNAKE, n. Our prostrate brother, "Homo ventrambulans".

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Brother Quotes

PERORATION, n. The explosion of an oratorical rocket. It dazzles, but to an observer having the wrong kind of nose its most conspicuous peculiarity is the smell of the several kinds of powder used in preparing it.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Kindness Quotes , Smell Quotes

Incompatibility. In matrimony a similarity of tastes, particularly the taste for domination.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Marriage Quotes , Taste Quotes

REALISM, n. The art of depicting nature as it is seem by toads. The charm suffusing a landscape painted by a mole, or a story written by a measuring-worm.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes , Nature Quotes

The covers of this book are too far apart.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes