Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Christian Quotes, Character Quotes

WIDOW, n. A pathetic figure that the Christian world has agreed to take humorously, although Christ's tenderness towards widows was one of the most marked features of his character.

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LOGANIMITY, n. The disposition to endure injury with meek forbearance while maturing a plan of revenge.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Revenge Quotes , Mature Quotes

MAGNITUDE, n. Size [that is] purely relative. If everything in the universe were increased 1,000 diameters nothing would be any larger than it was before, but if one thing remain unchanged all the others would be larger than they had been.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Would Be Quotes , Size Quotes

FINANCE, n. The art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager. The pronunciation of this word with the i long and the accent on the first syllable is one of America's most precious discoveries and possessions.

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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.

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A man is known by the company he organizes.

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Finance is the art or science of managing revenues and resources for the best advantage of the manager

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Youth is Gilead, in which is balm for every wound.

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A leech who, having penetrated the shell of a turtle only to find that the creature has long been dead, deems it expedient to form a new attachment to a fresh turtle.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Turtles Quotes , Attachment Quotes

At war with savages and idiots. To be a Frenchman abroad is to be miserable; to be an American abroad is to make others miserable.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , War Quotes , Savages Quotes

BRANDY, n. A cordial composed on one part thunder-and-lightning, one part remorse, two parts bloody murder, one part death-hell-and-the-grave and four parts clarified Satan.

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VITUPERATION, n. Saite, as understood by dunces and all such as suffer from an impediment in their wit.

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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.

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A revolution is a violent change of mismanagement.

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CALLOUS, adj. Gifted with great fortitude to bear the evils afflicting another.

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An accident is an inevitable occurrence due to the actions of immutable natural laws.

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History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.

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POTABLE, n. Suitable for drinking. Water is said to be potable; indeed, some declare it our natural beverage, although even they find it palatable only when suffering from the recurrent disorder known as thirst, for which it is a medicine. Upon nothing has so great and diligent ingenuity been brought to bear in all ages and in all countries, except the most uncivilized, as upon the invention of substitutes for water. To hold that this general aversion to that liquid has no basis in the preservative instinct of the race is to be unscientific-and without science we are as the snakes and toads.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , Drinking Quotes

THEOSOPHY, n. An ancient faith having all the certitude of religion and all the mystery of science.

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A popular writer writes about what people think. A wise writer offers them something to think about.

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