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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- Every rascal is not a thief, but every thief is a rascal.
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Tags : Aristotle Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- The movement of life has its rest in its own music.
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Tags : Rabindranath Tagore Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Auto racing, bull fighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports... all the others are games.
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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes
- More and more of our imports are coming from overseas
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes
- The difference between the right word and the almost right word is the difference between lightning and a lightning bug.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- The Common Law of England has been laboriously built about a mythical figure-the figure of 'The Reasonable Man'.
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Tags : A. P. Herbert Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- I can resist everything except temptation.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- The human body is in constant change the minute we're born. It's in a constant state of decay. We're all like Ford Escorts, just falling apart.
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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Fall Quotes
- I've just read that I am dead. Don't forget to delete me from your list of subscribers.
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Tags : Rudyard Kipling Quotes , Funny Quotes , Death Quotes
- If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wisdom Quotes
- I don't think I'll ever meet the perfect woman. I might have to get me one of them mail order women. You can do that: you send away to the Philippines, and they send you a wife. The only thing is, once you're on their mailing list, they keep sending you a relative a month whether you want it or not.
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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- Love is like a war; easy to start but hard to end and you never know where it might take you.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes
- Suppose the world were only one of God's jokes, would you work any the less to make it a good joke instead of a bad one?
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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- If a student takes the whole series of my folklore courses including the graduate seminars, he or she should learn something about fieldwork, something about bibliography, something about how to carry out library research, and something about how to publish that research.
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Tags : Alan Dundes Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait.
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Tags : A. Whitney Brown Quotes , Funny Quotes , Military Quotes
- She dotes on poetry, sir. She adores it; I may say that her whole soul and mind are wound up, and entwined with it. She has produced some delightful pieces, herself, sir. You may have met with her 'Ode to an Expiring Frog,' sir.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary.
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Tags : Robert Louis Stevenson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes
- Every saint has a past, and every sinner has a future.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes