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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- Perhaps, after all, America never has been discovered. I myself would say that it had merely been detected.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- " ... It is not my desire to wound the feelings of any person with whom I am connected in family bonds. I may be a hypocrite," said Mr. Pecksniff, cuttingly, "but I am not a brute."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Inspiration Quotes
- I have imbibed such a love for money that I keep some sequins in a drawer to count, and cry over them once a week.
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Tags : Lord Byron Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wisdom Quotes
- Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- True, a little learning is a dangerous thing, but it still beats total ignorance.
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Tags : Abigail Van Buren Quotes , Funny Quotes , Education Quotes
- Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- It's hard to be humble, when you're as great as I am.
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Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Motivational Quotes
- So that's why one of my rules of parody writing is that it's gotta be funny regardless of whether you know the source material. It has to work on its own merit.
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Tags : Al Yankovic Quotes , Funny Quotes , Writing Quotes
- I have insecurities of course, but I don't hang out with anyone who points them out to me.
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Tags : Adele Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hater Quotes
- Humor is also a way of saying something serious.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- One of the great things about books is sometimes there are some fantastic pictures.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- A poet can survive everything but a misprint.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- I sincerely want to meet the girl that was meant for me, but I want to sleep with the girls that weren't.
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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Girl Quotes
- Some men never feel small, but these are the few men who are.
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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes
- Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.
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Tags : Agnes Repplier Quotes , Funny Quotes , Women Quotes