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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- Nothing has really happened until it has been recorded.
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Tags : Virginia Woolf Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- It comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him.
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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- A prisoner of war is a man who tries to kill you and fails, and then asks you not to kill him.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- Men are like bank accounts. Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes
- The French complain of everything, and always.
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Tags : Napoleon Bonaparte Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- My father must have had some elementary education for he could read and write and keep accounts inaccurately
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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes
- A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- You can put lipstick on a pig. It's still a pig.
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Tags : Barack Obama Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbors and laugh at them in our turn?
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Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes
- Accidents will occur in the best regulated families.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Family Quotes
- Great art is the contempt of a great man for small art.
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Tags : F. Scott Fitzgerald Quotes , Funny Quotes , Art Quotes
- As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- Americans are like a rich father who wishes he knew how to give his son the hardships that made him rich.
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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes
- I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- If one tells the truth, one is sure, sooner or later, to be found out.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes
- If you send a damned fool to St. Louis, and you don't tell them he's a damned fool, they'll never find out.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- If you desire to drain to the dregs the fullest cup of scorn and hatred that a fellow human being can pour out for you, let a young mother hear you call dear baby 'it.'
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Mom Quotes
- May God defend me from my friends: I can defend myself from my enemies.
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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes