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  • Funny Quotes   957
  • If you're a guy, you have absolutely no idea what's going on at any time in the relationship, ever. Here's what you know: you know when you're getting laid, and you know when it's all over. Those are the only two things you're aware of.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
  • Figures often beguile me, particularly when I have the arranging of them myself; in which case the remark attributed to Disraeli would often apply with justice and force: "There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics."
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lying Quotes
  • As soon as you lay down, that's when the most bizarre things start coming out of her mouth. 'Goodnight, baby.' 'Do you think we were together in a past life?' 'Yeah, and I died of sleep deprivation. Go to bed.' 'Don't you feel like we're soul...'
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Baby Quotes