Adam Ferrara Quotes, Funny Quotes, Girlfriend Quotes

I love my girlfriend, don't get me wrong. I truly love this woman, but I have the ability to have sex without any emotional involvement. It's a gift.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Girlfriend Quotes

Accidents will occur in the best regulated families.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Family Quotes

By appreciation, we make excellence in others our own property.

5 years ago

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Appreciation Quotes

It's not because John McCain doesn't care. It's because John McCain doesn't get it.

5 years ago

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Tags : Barack Obama Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

A man can well afford to be as bold as brass, my good fellow, when he gets gold in exchange!

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

What is wrong with the prosaic Englishman is what is wrong with the prosaic men of all countries: stupidity.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Country Quotes

It takes a thoroughly good woman to do a thoroughly stupid thing

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Women Quotes

No orator can top the one who can give good nicknames.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The funniest things are the forbidden.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Eat a live frog first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Genius is born-not paid

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

Don't let schooling interfere with your education.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

The idea that no gentleman ever swears is all wrong. He can swear and still be a gentleman if he does it in a nice and benevolent and affectionate way.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Nice Quotes

History teaches us that men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all other alternatives.

6 years ago

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Tags : Abba Eban Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

You can always rely on America to do the right thing -- once it has exhausted the alternatives.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.

5 years ago

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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Our civilization has decided that determining the guilt or innocence of men is a thing too important to be trusted to trained men. When it wants a library catalogued, or the solar system discovered, or any trifle of that kind, it uses up its specialists. But when it wishes anything done which is really serious, it collects twelve of the ordinary men standing round. The same thing was done, if I remember right, by the Founder of Christianity.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Journalists are like dogs, when ever anything moves they begin to bark.

5 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Schopenhauer Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dog Quotes