Mark Twain Quotes, Sarcastic Quotes, Inspiration Quotes

In India, 'cold weather' is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door-knob and weather which will only make it mushy.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

I find that the further I go back, the better things were, whether they happened or not.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Trust Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Some people approach every problem with an open mouth.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adlai E. Stevenson Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

I have witnessed and greatly enjoyed the first act of everything which Wagner created, but the effect on me has always been so powerful that one act was quite sufficient; whenever I have witnessed two acts I have gone away physically exhausted; and whenever I have ventured an entire opera the result has been the next thing to suicide.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Beach Quotes

Germany, the diseased world's bathhouse.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Germany Quotes

The English have a miraculous power of turning wine into water.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

He is really not so ugly after all, provided, of course, that one shuts one's eyes, and does not look at him.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

She's good, being gone.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

However, it is always nice to be expected, and not to arrive.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

If one could only teach the English how to talk, and the Irish how to listen, society here would be quite civilized.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Poor Faulkner. Does he really think big emotions come from big words?

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Music Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

He knows nothing and thinks he knows everything. That points clearly to a political career.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Fork: An instrument used chiefly for the purpose of putting dead animals into the mouth.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Animal Quotes

What are the proper proportions of a maxim? A minimum of sound to a maximum of sense.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

The basis of action is lack of imagination. It is the last resource of those who know not how to dream.

4 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes