Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Alive Quotes, Advantage Quotes

GOOD, adj. Sensible, madam, to the worth of this present writer. Alive, sir, to the advantages of letting him alone.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Alive Quotes , Advantage Quotes

WRATH, n. Anger of a superior quality and degree, appropriate to exalted characters and momentous occasions; as, "the wrath of God," "the day of wrath," etc. . . .

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Character Quotes , Wrath Quotes

Miss, n. A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) and Mister (Mr.) are the three most distinctly disagreeable words in the language, in sound and sense. Two are corruptions of Mistress, the other of Master. In the general abolition of social titles in this our country they miraculously escaped to plague us. If we must have them let us be consistent and give one to the unmarried man. I venture to suggest Mush, abbreviated to Mh.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , Men Quotes

Wisdom is known only by contrasting it with folly; by shadow only we perceive that all visible objects are not flat. Yet Philanthropos would abolish evil!

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Evil Quotes , Shadow Quotes

YANKEE, n. In Europe, an American. In the Northern States of our Union, a New Englander. In the Southern States the word is unknown.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Yankees Quotes , Europe Quotes

The Senate is a body of old men charged with high duties and misdemeanors.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Body Quotes

Age - That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no longer the vigor to commit.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Time Quotes

HURRICANE, n. An atmospheric demonstration once very common but now generally abandoned for the tornado and cyclone. The hurricane is still in popular use in the West Indies and is preferred by certain old- fashioned sea-captains.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Science Quotes , West Indies Quotes

A bad marriage is like an electrical thrilling machine: it makes you dance, but you can't let go.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Marriage Quotes , Letting Go Quotes

PLEBEIAN, n. An ancient Roman who in the blood of his country stained nothing but his hands. Distinguished from the Patrician, who was a saturated solution.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , Blood Quotes

Past, n. That part of Eternity with some small fraction of which we have a slight and regrettable acquaintance. A moving line called the Present parts it from an imaginary period known as the Future. These two grand divisions of Eternity, of which the one is continually effacing the other, are entirely unlike. The one is dark with sorrow and disappointment, the other bright with prosperity and joy.... Yet the Past is the Future of yesterday, the Future is the Past of to-morrow. They are one-the knowledge and the dream.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Dream Quotes , Disappointment Quotes

MULTITUDE, n. A crowd; the source of political wisdom and virtue. In a republic, the object of the statesman's adoration.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Political Quotes

A king's staff of office, the sign and symbol of his authority. It was originally a mace with which the sovereign admonished his jester and vetoed ministerial measures by breaking the bones of their proponents.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Kings Quotes , Office Quotes

Suffrage, noun. Expression of opinion by means of a ballot. The right of suffrage (which is held to be both a privilege and a duty) means, as commonly interpreted, the right to vote for the man of another man's choice, and is highly prized.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mean Quotes , Men Quotes

UBIQUITY, n. The gift or power of being in all places at one time, but not in all places at all times, which is omnipresence, an attribute of God and the luminiferous ether only.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Time Quotes , Power Quotes

There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes

Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Spiritual Quotes

DIAGNOSIS, n. A physician's forecast of disease by the patient's pulse and purse.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Science Quotes , Pulse Quotes

OBLIVION, n. The state or condition in which the wicked cease from struggling and the dreary are at rest. Fame's eternal dumping ground.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Struggle Quotes , Wicked Quotes

Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Peace Quotes , Government Quotes