Adam Carolla Quotes, Funny Quotes, Lonely Quotes

I'd be at someone's house or be up on the roof all day and I'd get lonely - stir crazy - and talk radio became this soothing voice in my life. But the idea that I was making $10 an hour and stacking drywall while these guys were making a few hundred thousand, and they were having a party, and there were Playmates and there were good times, I just couldn't imagine it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lonely Quotes

Governments need to have both shepherds and butchers.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Government Quotes

Hegel was right when he said that we learn from history that men never learn anything from history.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Frazier is so ugly that he should donate his face to the US Bureau of Wild Life.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beauty Quotes

He has no enemies, but he is intensely disliked by his friends.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes

The girls are beautiful in Hollywood - and enough silicon to caulk a sink.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beautiful Quotes

Know the rules well, so you can break them effectively.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Dalai Lama Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity. Another man's, I mean.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

I spoke to my dad, and he said it took close to 90 dollars to raise me. But that was me and my sister, and my sister moved out when she was 16, so sometimes it can knock you up to triple digits to raise a kid.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dad Quotes

I always like to know everything about my new friends, and nothing about my old ones.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

The faults of the burglar are the qualities of the financier.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Lying Quotes

It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kings Quotes

I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

As he was valiant, I honour him. But as he was ambitious, I slew him.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me - you can't get fooled again.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

Give me the luxuries and I can dispense with the necessities.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Growing Up Quotes

The role of humour is to make people fall down and writhe on the Axminster, and that is the top and bottom of it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Alan Coren Quotes , Funny Quotes , Fall Quotes

One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Alan Shearer Quotes , Funny Quotes , Soccer Quotes