Margaret Thatcher Quotes, Funny Quotes, World Quotes

It's a funny old world.

5 years ago

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Tags : Margaret Thatcher Quotes , Funny Quotes , World Quotes

A dictatorship would be a heck of a lot easier, there's no question about it.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

I woke up my pop in the middle of the night 'cause the boogie man's under my bed. My pop is this big, huge man, nothing can hurt him. I went running into his bedroom like, 'Daddy, Daddy, the boogie man's under the bed!' Pop opens one eye, he's like, 'Is the boogie man bigger than me?' 'Well, no Daddy, he's not.' 'Well, you got your choice: you can deal with the boogie man or you can deal with me.'

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Running Quotes

It's your money. You paid for it.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

We have really everything in common with America nowadays, except, of course, language.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

The majority of husbands remind me of an orangutan trying to play the violin.

5 years ago

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Tags : Honore De Balzac Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

No man knows he is young while he is young.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I have attended operas, whenever I could not help it, for fourteen years now; I am sure I know of no agony comparable to the listening to an unfamiliar opera.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.

5 years ago

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Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Funny Quotes , Success Quotes

Democracy means simply the bludgeoning of the people by the people for the people.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Why, except as a means of livelihood, a man should desire to act on the stage when he has the whole world to act in, is not clear to me.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Mean Quotes

The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist sees what he has come to see.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Mmm, tastes like hepatitis!

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Only the shallow know themselves.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

Mr. Bazzard's father, being a Norfolk farmer, would have furiously laid about him with a flail, a pitch-fork, and every agricultural implement available for assaulting purposes, on the slightest hint of his son's having written a play.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes

If you desire to drain to the dregs the fullest cup of scorn and hatred that a fellow human being can pour out for you, let a young mother hear you call dear baby 'it.'

5 years ago

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Mom Quotes

Deceiving others. That is what the world calls a romance.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

As he was valiant, I honour him. But as he was ambitious, I slew him.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes