Adam Ferrara Quotes, Funny Quotes, Girl Quotes

The biggest thing in my life right now is my girlfriend. I love this girl. I know I love her because she told me.

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Girl Quotes

I quite agree with Dr. Nordau's assertion that all men of genius are insane, but Dr. Nordau forgets that all sane people are idiots.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes

To those of you who received honours, awards and distinctions, I say, well done. And to the C students, I say, you too can be president of the United States.

4 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Graduation Quotes

To those of you who received honours, awards and distinctions, I say, well done. And to the C students, I say, you too can be president of the United States.

4 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Graduation Quotes

Whenever cannibals are on the brink of starvation, Heaven, in its infinite mercy, sends them a fat missionary.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

I was never ruined but twice: once when I lost a lawsuit, and once when I won one.

4 years ago

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

No, my friend, I am not drunk. I have just been to the dentist, and need not return for another six months! Is it not the most beautiful thought? --Poirot

5 years ago

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Tags : Agatha Christie Quotes , Funny Quotes , Beautiful Quotes

Great art is the contempt of a great man for small art.

4 years ago

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Tags : F. Scott Fitzgerald Quotes , Funny Quotes , Art Quotes

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Some men never feel small, but these are the few men who are.

4 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Men Quotes

To disagree with three-fourths of the British public is one of the first requisites of sanity.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Law Quotes

When the ax came into the forest the trees said the handle is one of us.

4 years ago

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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Tree Quotes

If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wisdom Quotes

When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

I have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which I sometimes so madly indulge. It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that I have periled life and reputation and reason. It has been the desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom.

5 years ago

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Tags : Edgar Allan Poe Quotes , Funny Quotes , Pain Quotes

Life is as tedious as twice-told tale, vexing the dull ear of a drowsy man.

5 years ago

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

All happy families resemble one another, each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

5 years ago

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Tags : Leo Tolstoy Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Why is it that we rejoice at a birth and grieve at a funeral? It is because we are not the person involved.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes

Freedom of the press is guaranteed only to those who own one.

5 years ago

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Tags : A. J. Liebling Quotes , Funny Quotes , Media Control Quotes