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Funny Quotes
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Funny Quotes 957
- Whatever advice you give, be short.
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Tags : Horace Quotes , Funny Quotes , Giving Quotes
- Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- They misunderestimated me.
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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hilarious Quotes
- Really, if the lower orders don't set a good example, what on earth is the use of them?
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- The only time my education was interrupted was when I was in school.
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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Senior Quotes
- Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Life Quotes
- Women are made to be loved, not understood.
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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Sunshine is my quest.
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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sunshine Quotes
- You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes
- Think! I've got enough to do, and little enough to get for it, without thinking.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- The reason why worry kills more people than work is that more people worry than work.
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Tags : Robert Frost Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- It is true, I worry about the hype. The only person more over-hyped than me is you.
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Tags : Barack Obama Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes
- The true triumph of reason is that it enables us to get along with those who do not possess it.
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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Triumph Quotes
- Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes
- It is not funny that anything else should fall down; only that a man should fall down... Why do we laugh? Because it is a grave religious matter: it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd: for only man can be dignified.
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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Religious Quotes
- Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes
- One good thing about music, when it hits you, you feel no pain.
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Tags : Bob Marley Quotes , Funny Quotes , Music Quotes
- When the eyes say one thing, and the tongue another, a practiced man relies on the language of the first.
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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Communication Quotes