Adam Ferrara Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humor Quotes

Ladies, your happiness is very important to us. You have to understand that. Because when you're happy, you let us touch you.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

"It's an old habit of mine, Wal'r," said the Captain, "any time these fifty year. When you see Ned Cuttle bite his nails, Wal'r, then you may know that Ned Cuttle's aground."

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

We are too civil to books. For a few golden sentences we will turn over and actually read a volume of four or five hundred pages.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ralph Waldo Emerson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Book Quotes

Ladies and gentlemen are permitted to have friends in the kennel, but not in the kitchen.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Kitchen Quotes

We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.

5 years ago

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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Women have a wonderful instinct about things. They can discover everything except the obvious.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

It is very simple to be happy, but it is very difficult to be simple.

5 years ago

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Tags : Rabindranath Tagore Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Every rascal is not a thief, but every thief is a rascal.

5 years ago

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Tags : Aristotle Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

Sunshine is my quest.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sunshine Quotes

Both optimists and pessimists contribute to society. The optimist invents the aeroplane, the pessimist the parachute.

5 years ago

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Funny Quotes , Motivational Quotes

Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Many are stubborn in pursuit of the path they have chosen, few in pursuit of the goal.

5 years ago

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Tags : Friedrich Nietzsche Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

A book is made from a tree. It is an assemblage of flat, flexible parts (still called "leaves") imprinted with dark pigmented squiggles. One glance at it and you hear the voice of another person, perhaps someone dead for thousands of years. Across the millennia, the author is speaking, clearly and silently, inside your head, directly to you. Writing is perhaps the greatest of human inventions, binding together people, citizens of distant epochs, who never knew one another. Books break the shackles of time ― proof that humans can work magic.

5 years ago

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Tags : Carl Sagan Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment.

5 years ago

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Tags : Jane Austen Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

Only one marriage I regret. I remember after I got that marriage license I went across from the license bureau to a bar for a drink. The bartender said, "What will you have, sir?" And I said, "A glass of hemlock."

5 years ago

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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

"Ah, Miss, hope is an excellent thing for such as has the spirits to bear it!" said Mrs Wickam, shaking her head. "My own spirits is not equal to it, but I don't owe it any grudge. I envys them that is so blest!"

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If you cry ''Forward'' you must be sure to make clear the direction in which to go. Don't you see that if you fail to do that and simply call out the word to a monk and a revolutionary, they will go in precisely opposite directions?

5 years ago

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Tags : Anton Chekhov Quotes , Funny Quotes , Failure Quotes